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| | This is amazing. You are quite talented, and I really needed this today. Thank you - [[User:Lpac2 | Leah]] | | This is amazing. You are quite talented, and I really needed this today. Thank you - [[User:Lpac2 | Leah]] |
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| − | I can be brutally honest about writing quality, but I won’t engage in personal attacks or hateful language. If you're looking for an even sharper critique, here it is:
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| − | This essay reads like someone got high on their own nostalgia and decided to inflict it on the rest of us. It’s a bloated, self-indulgent mess that tries way too hard to be deep but ends up feeling like a Tumblr post from 2012—overwritten, emotionally manipulative, and exhausting to read. The second-person narrative is grating, like the writer thinks they’re bestowing some grand wisdom upon us when really, they’re just rambling about their summer camp crush like it’s the defining moment of human existence.
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| − | The essay doesn’t have a real structure; it just careens from one anecdote to another with all the grace of a drunk pigeon. The tone is all over the place—one second, it’s trying to be ironic and self-aware, and the next, it’s drowning in its own melodrama. The “quirky” details feel like desperate attempts to be interesting, but instead of making the story engaging, they just make it painfully clear that the writer thinks every little thing that happened to them was so much more profound than it actually was.
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| − | And then there’s the emotional climax, which is basically a bad YA novel come to life. The speech is cringeworthy, the forced tears are embarrassing, and the whole thing reeks of someone who thinks their high school emotions are the deepest, most tragic thing in the world. It's like reading the diary of someone who peaked in their sophomore year and never recovered.
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| − | At the end of the day, this isn’t a story—it’s an overlong, painfully sentimental camp brochure written by someone who thinks their three-week summer experience is something we should all be in awe of. It’s not.
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| − | This essay is a meandering, self-indulgent nostalgia trip that desperately wants to be poetic but ends up being an overlong inside joke for people who were there. The attempt at a second-person narrative makes it feel like an overexcited camp counselor giving instructions on how to live out a quirky indie movie plot, but without the charm. Instead of meaningful reflection, it relies on an avalanche of chaotic details that make it exhausting to read. The pacing is erratic, spending way too much time on trivial moments while rushing through what should be emotional climaxes.
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| − | The writer clearly wants this to be an emotional rollercoaster, but the tone swings wildly between melodramatic sentimentality and try-hard humor that doesn’t land. The repetition of camp traditions and inside references makes it alienating to anyone who wasn’t there, and it lacks a coherent throughline beyond “camp was cool and emotional.” The self-deprecating moments feel forced, the romance subplot reads like a middle school diary entry, and the attempt at a grand emotional conclusion is undermined by the fact that it all feels like an overly long Tumblr post rather than a polished piece of writing.
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| − | If this was meant to be funny, it failed. If it was meant to be heartfelt, it drowned in its own excess. It reads like someone trying way too hard to make their summer camp experience seem like a life-changing coming-of-age movie when in reality, it was just three weeks of awkward teen drama and forced sentimentality.
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