Sweet Transvestite

Sweet Transvestite follows The Time Warp on Second Saturday as part of the Rocky Horror Picture Show festivities at Lancaster.

Lyrics

[Frank]: How d'you do, I see you've met my faithful handyman.
He's just a little brought down because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman.
Don't get strung out by the way that I look,
Don't judge a book by its cover.
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,
But by night I'm one hell of a lover.

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

So let me show you around, maybe play you a sound.
You look like you're both pretty groovy.
Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal,
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

[Brad]: I'm glad we caught you at home, could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry.

[Janet]: Right!

[Brad]: We'll just say where we are, then go back to the car.
We don't want to be any worry.

[Frank]: So you got caught with a flat, well, how about that?
Well babies, don't you panic.
By the light of the night, it'll all seem alright
I'll get you a satanic mechanic.

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

So why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite?
I could show you my favourite obsession.
I've been making a man with blond hair and a tan
And he's good for relieving my tension

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.
Hey, Hey, I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

[spoken by Frank]: So come up to the lab. And see what's on the slab. I see you shiver with antici...
[Audience]: Say it! Say it, Master!
[Frank]: pation!
[Audience]: What's masterpation?
[Frank]: But maybe the rain isn't really to blame
[Audience]: Unless we're in Mayser! (LAN 06.2)
[Frank]: So I'll remove the cause
[Audience]: What about the symptom?
[Frank]: but not the symptom.