Memories:LAN

2005

2005.1 -- Discovering Love in the World

Dan Salvato, the Son of the Holy Trinity in 2008.1, was ironically as non-traditionalist as possible during his first year in 2005.1. He had come to CTY during the lowest point of his three-year depression; he felt that CTY would give him a chance to start his life over with new people. Dan was generally happy at CTY, staying inside during dances to play cards and spending every Quad Time in his hall. However, his depression still affected him; he sometimes felt like everyone cared about each other more than Dan. Feeling that CTY was nothing special for him, he decided not to return the next year.

Because of a thunderstorm on the day of the last dance, all students were required to report to the ASFC, which Dan was unhappy about. However, he managed to play cards with his friends against the wall, despite the blaring Canon songs in the background. Eventually, though, Dan's card-playing friends dispersed, and Dan was left alone to sit against the wall. Nightswimming began to play, and Dan was terribly upset - he was all alone again, just like at home. But then he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up to see Artem, a onemore in his hall with a wonderful heart. He asked Dan what was wrong, only to get a shrug in return. Artem then said to Dan, "Hey, if there's something bothering you, you can always come to me to talk about it, and I'll always be here to listen and understand. I care about you, I want you to know that."

Dan felt something he had never felt before. He realized that maybe there were people out there - amazing people with amazing hearts; people who could care and listen; people who could love. Dan knew he had somebody in the world, and he knew if he came back he could find more. He decided to return to CTY for as long as he was able to, and his three-year depression was over. Since then, he has tried his hardest to help people with their feelings whenever he could; he wants to show people the same love that was one day given to him. Maybe he can change a life, too.

2006

2006.2 -- Sexapussy (The Sexapus)

During Second Saturday of 2006.02, Crafting the Essay 3C student Ashok was getting bored as the day was dragging on to around 4:00, the end of the activities. Hallmate Greg Lawrence IV had had some twisty balloons mailed to him, and Ashok had collected 2 balloons so far that Greg had left lying around, presumed to be broken. Upon returning to his room, Ashok suddenly had an idea: he would make a balloon octopus! Quickly, Ashok scoured the hall for 2 more balloons. Alas, he only found one more, but not to be deterred, he used the 3 balloons he had to make a six-armed octopus. And thus Sexapussy, The Sexapus, was born.

Ashok took the Sexapus to the 3rd Dubbs lounge, which was at the top floor of South Ben and very hot. As the people in the lounge started playing with Sexapussy, a few were interested in how slowly it fell. Noticing that there were several fans cooling the room, Ashok and RA Adam Roush set up 3 fans pointing upwards and dropped Sexapussy into the current. For the next half-hour or so, Sexapussy would float to the top of the room, then flip and fall, then flip and spin around several times while catching the air currents and floating upwards again. In summary, it would float, flip, and spin without touching the ground for several minutes at a time, and it looked really cool. Word of the Sexapus got around quickly, and many people came up to 3rd Dubbs to see the balloon creature. Unfortunately, someone jostled one of the fans before a good video could be taken, and it couldn't be put quite in the same position so that the Sexapus would float as long again. Later, Adam and some others tied inflated plastic bags onto 3 of Sexapussy's 6 arms, which made it float much slower and longer.

Sexapussy suffered the same unfortunate fate that all balloons must, unfortunately, but plans for a bigger setup are under way.

P.S. we all secretly (or not so secretly) want to have the sexapussy's babies. its true. ~Yulia speaking for all of CTY who witnessed the glory that was Sexapussy.

Years later, a live "hexapus" was found in a British aquatic zoo.

2006.2 -- The Legend of The Ivan

For those of you who don't know (i.e. those of you who weren't in Archaeology or Advanced Chem 06.2), this is the legend of The Ivan, collaborate on by Lena and AmanDaray (Amanda Ray).

It unfolds thusly: Soon after arrival at CTY, Amandar and Lena conversed and became friends. Of the myriad unusual and nerdy things discussed, the subject soon veered towards sex, drugs, communists and other such risque business (as CTY conversations have a knack for doing). Amandar brought forth the idea of locating an individual on campus to stalk for the remainder of the session, an idea that was met with enthusiasm from the not yet "attached-at-the-hip-and-left-knee-to-Kib" [The origin of this quotation remains uncertain] Lena. Walking past the arches, Lena spotted a more than adequate stalkee and rushed to inform Amandar of the charming new development.

The two giddily overeager students and some friends they told about the stalkee stared at, "casually" walked by, and giggled uncontrollably at and around him for excessive amounts of time. He was of slim build, dark hair, and pasty complexion. On some occasions, he wore grey Asics of the same style as Lena's. He was often seen carrying an "indie" messenger bag and reading books while eating meals instead of socializing, like an "emo" student would. He often appeared very pensive and existential (if it is possible for one to look existential). He had a Russian look about him, and was soon dubbed a communist. At breakfast, Lena once remarked that he looked as if he should be at a coffee shop or vintage record store "like, in Belgium or somewhere!" which prompted the notion that he was a stereotypical Kerouac-esque beat traveler, and all of his books were written by Nietzsche, Camus, Ginsberg, and Palahniuk. Upon writing a report on fourteenth-century Russia in class, Lena researched Ivan the Terrible and immediately decided that the stalkee's name must be Ivan, Nikolai, or Sven or "something swanky like that." Ivan was preferred by Amandar and the matter was settled.

At first, since he was too old to be a camper, and looked too mystical and worldly to be a TA or teacher (and obviously wasn't an RA), Amandar was misled to believe that he was a random F&M college student crashing CTY meals for unknown, mysterious reasons. Soon thereafter, one of the CTYers involved in the stalkage discovered that he did, in fact, have a black lanyard. This prompted Amandar to drag a whining Lena to the bulletin board outside the Nurse's office in Thomas where the pictures of RAs and TAs were posted. To both girls' dismay, the elusive stalkee's picture was ripped from the board, probably by a first session CTYer. They did, however, discover his real name, Nicolas (surprisingly close to Nikolai!), and that he TAed MIND B.

By the third week, Ivan probably was well aware that he was being stalked, especially since an involved CTYer, Kristin, decided to approach him and strike up a conversation which promptly failed. Lena had kind of forgotten about him by this point, but Amandar was still recruiting stalkers to join the rapidly growing cult of Ivanites. She hopes Ivan will return next year so the tradition can be passed on, but they probably freaked him out too much, in addition to everyone in MIND B. Apparently, no one in MIND B had caught on that their TA was being stalked by everyone in ARCH, CHEM, and a few random people from paleo and other classes.

Here is a strategically taken picture of Ivan and Amandar's shoulder by another A-Chem student:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v342/fefifofelen/cty/2lan06/5da2re2.jpg

Jeff Sachs says:

 As a member of Mind B. I am completely shocked that people were stalking Nicolas "Fries"
 Friesner. Although I did read some interesting Dr. Uffy, Fries, Lectern, fanfics...

Laney Newhouse says:

 DO NOT LISTEN TO JEFF SACHS. THAT IS A LIE. THERE WAS NO FANFICTION WRITTEN ABOUT DR. UFFIE, FRIES   
 OR THE LECTERN, AND CERTAINLY NOT ABOUT THE THREE OF THEM ENGAGING IN ILLICIT ACTIVITIES TOGETHER. 
 However, I, too, am very much amused by the stalkage of our beloved TA, and would like to note that 
 a lot of members of our class stalked him as well, as they found him quite attractive and soulful.

Amanda Ray says:

 'Twas the great Amandar herself who discovered the black lanyard, silly Lena.

2006.2 -- Waffle House

On the last day of CTY, two CTY'ers, Harrison and Jordan, thought it would be a good idea to go to the waffle House on Harrison's last day at CTY. The plan was to sneak out and have Andrew, another boy in their hall, prop the door open. They made it past Turkey Hill and into the Waffle House, where they had a lovely breakfast. On their way back, they were stopped by the Lancaster police for being out past curfew. After trying unsuccessfully to pass themselves off as townies, they were carted back to F&M, where it was discovered that Andrew had indeed not propped the door open. While the administration couldn't do much to Harrison, as he was a nomore and it was the last day of the session, Jordan was not allowed to come back for his nomore year.

2007

2007.1 -- Balcony Incidents

The only person to witness the balcony incident was Dan Salvato. The entire campus was on its way to the ASFC to watch the annual Talent Show. Dan, however, was a performer in the Talent Show and was preparing to depart with the other performers, who were grouped in Thomas Hall. A Rubik's Cube was needed as a prop for one of the MC acts, and Dan was asked to run back to his dorm in North Ben to get his cube as quickly as possible. At the front of North Ben were three RAs (Dan does not remember who) - two were at ground level, and one was a floor up on the balcony. All three RAs were laughing as the bottom two RAs attempted to toss a lanyard up to the RA on the balcony - they missed several times, and the lanyard fell back down. This is a major rule violation and would get all the balconies banned if any of the RAs caught students tossing anything up or down the balcony. It was very funny for Dan to watch, but unfortunately, he couldn't think of anything witty to say to the RAs at the time. He returned to Thomas Hall with the Rubik's Cube, and the RAs were never caught by anyone else.

There was a second incident leading to the near-banning of the Muhlenburg/Mull balcony and possibly all other balconies due to the throwing of sprinkles off it. This occurred after the 4th dance while everyone was coming in from the afterdance. The two perpetrators were stopped by two CTY students because they did not want the balconies to be banned. The following day, an RA noticed and called a hall meeting for Muhlenburg and Mull to try to figure out what happened. The RA accused these two halls because they were the only ones with sprinkles.The punishment would be having to clean up other halls. Luckily, one of the two students that stopped the two perpetrators was in one of these halls, and told his RA what he saw. The perpetrators were caught and the balconies stayed open, and the halls were not punished. One perpetrator was from outside the hall, and his punishments are unknown.

2008

2008.1 -- Brotime

On the talent show program, an act midway through the set was listed only as "Brotime." This act turned out to be five male RAs dancing to Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go," leading to much laughter and many cheers from the female students. The next day, at the final dance, "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" was played. As soon as it was started, there were many yells of "BROTIME!", people cleared the blacktop, and the fivesome performed. Then, at closing ceremonies, two encore acts from the talent show were scheduled; Dan Salvato, Alan He, and Victor Song's breakdancing, and Sarah Hackney, Sarah Parr, and Rachel Khatan's singing and playing Scarborough Fair. The breakdancing went over well (besides the fact that the iPod's battery died mid-performance), but before the Scarborough Fair act went on, there was some sort of altercation between Sarah H.'s guitar and a member of the History of Disease class, rendering it unplayable. Therefore, Sarah had to rush to get a spare, leaving a large time gap. Some students yelled "Brotime!" and weren't taken seriously at first, but when more students called for Brotime, RA Mama Kate asked if anyone in the ASFC had Wham on their iPod. Both Byron Callan and Jeremy Strege donated their iPods and Brotime put on one final performance for the CTYers and parents. They received a standing ovation.

2008.1 -- "Hey, Shae!"

During a break in Rocky Horror rehearsal on Second Saturday, certain students who here shall remain unnamed (due both to lack of consent from both parties and also full group LAN O8.1 memory of the event anyways) engaged in flagrant violation of PDA rules. Unbeknownst to them, RA Shae (still fully in drag)entered Mull/Muhlenberg 2nd lounge, with a full view of them from the door. It took a few tries from other students to get their attention, but once they realized Shae was there, one student immediately jumped off the other and onto the chair arm, and essentially hid behind a combination of knees and carefully-draped hair. Suddenly, jumbled excuses were heard from various unknown parts of the lounge about "part of the rehearsal" and "in the lab...on the slab!" Shae, who appeared somewhat startled, seemed to accept these excuses, and then said something about having to go get Adam Roush to watch the rehearsal, followed by what seemed like a plea: "Please don't make out anymore...!" After Shae's exit, the two students were ridiculed. This ridicule continued for the rest of the session, by changing the practice of directing the words "Hey, Frank!" to the air behind a PDA-ing couple with "Hey, Shae!" especially for this particular couple.