The Afterdance

Lancaster

Session 2

This is the current list and probable order of Afterdance songs for Lancaster Session 2 as of the last dance.

The After-dance always begins with the circle song. It always ends with the chant, and immediately preceding it is the Beer Song, as of 2006.

The Circle Song

One person begins "May I please have a circle?", or some similar phrase; everyone else then calls back "What's a circle?"

If you're in College 1, which is a humanities course, a circle is an O. (Ohhh...)

If you're in College 3, which is a math course, a circle is x²+y²=r² where r² is usually, but not always, 1, 4, 9, 16, 25, 36, 42, etc!

If you're in College 2, which is a science course, a circle is "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" or "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE." [explanation: while saying "eee," you must have one hand over your eyes and the other pointing as you spin around in a circle demonstration the Doppler effect. Then you switch direction and hands on the next "eee"]

(Why?) BECAUSE THEY'RE DIFFERENT!!

The Hokey-Pokey

You put your [insert appendage here] in,
You put your [ ] out,
You put your [ ] in and you shake it all about,
You do the Hokey-Pokey and you turn yourself about
Thats what its all about! OINK OINK!

[Appendages: right foot, left foot, right hand, left hand, fob (for the last dance this becomes "lanyard" or "no fob" because students have already turned in their fobs), skull, whole self.]

Cows are Freaky

Cows are freaky when they look at you
and they're freaky when they look at me too.
So if you meet a cow that's high on crack,
don't be a cowboy and try to ride its back
'cause cows are freaky when they look at you
and they're freaky when they look at me too!

C is for Cookie

"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
Cookie, Cookie, Cookie starts with "C".

If you take a bite out of a cookie, it looks like a C.
And if you take a bite out of a donut, it also looks like a C.
But it is not as good.
And sometimes the MOON looks like a C
But you can't eat that,

"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
"C" is for Cookie;
That's good enough for me.
Cookie, Cookie, Cookie starts with "C".

[varies very slighty from orginal Cookie Monster song.]

Added and led by Jeff Sachs after hearing it on Sarah Danly's iPod on the 2nd dance of LAN.06.2.

Nickel

Also, on the last dance of 06.2, a round of Nickel was led by Noelle. The song goes as follows:

My name is Michael
I've got a nickel shiny and new
I'm gonna buy me
All sorts of candy
Thats what I'm gonna do!

My girl is Cindy
When we get married
We're gonna have a baby or two.
We're gonna take them
To see their grandmas
That's what we're gonna do.

This song will probably not continue as part of the Afterdance.

Eyelashes

Once I met a boy,
[And] He didn't have any eyelashes.
So I went and asked him why,
[And] He said he didn't know.
So I went and asked his mom
[And] She hadn't noticed anyway.
So I went and asked his dad
[And] He said he didn't know.
So I went and asked his neighbors
[And] His neighbors <pump fist> said to "GO AWAY!"
So I went and asked his dog,
But he wasn't very helpful. <optional shrug>
So I went and asked his friends,
[And] His friends said "who the hell are you talking about?"
So I went and asked his teacher
She said (its because) he had too many tonguesszzzzzzzz.

In Heaven There Is No Beer (The Beer Song)

Note: The name used is Phil in honor of Phil Gunn who died of heart problems shortly after LAN.05.2. This idea was proposed by the then-nomore Pickle, here. Note #2: At LAN.06.1, Pickle's suggestion was followed through with.

-Hey Phil! Is there any beer in heaven?
All: Lets find out! [ommitted 06.1 and 06.2]

[To sum up and clarify all of this: traditionally, the above back-and-forth has been used, but at LAN.06.1 and LAN.06.2 the chant was addressed to Phil. Since Phil was unable to respond, the responding part of the chant was lost. The song is sometimes referred to as "The Phil Song."]

In heaven there is no beer!
NO BEER
That's why we drink it here!
RIGHT HERE!
And when we're gone from here!
FROM HERE!
Our friends will drink our beer!
OUR BEER!

Tra la la la LA LA!
LA LA! [clap on both]
Tra la la la la la!
LA LA! [clap on both]
Tra la la la la la!
LA LA! [clap on both]
Tra la la la la la!
(Leader: FASTER!)
[repeat entire thing three times, faster each subsequent time, and [optional] draw out the very last "la."]

CTY, You Have a Nice Butt!

CTY, YOU HAVE A NICE BUTT!
CTY, WE LOVE YOU!
TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES, TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES,
CTY, WE LOVE YOU!

The chant is shouted at the top of your lungs while running joggingskipping back to your dorms. Do not stop until you have reached your dorm, your room if you're really hardcore, or your bed if you're über-hardxcore. When dances are in the ASFC and students trek slowly over a long distance to get back to their dorms, this chant can go on for a long time indeed, to the chagrin of staff members.

This ....phenomenon? originated at LAN.00, and in its original form contained the last line "1999!", which was irrelevant even then.

Note: At LAN.05.1 and LAN.06.1, the above chant was shouted a few times by the students assembled in the circle, until a few RAs, who had assembled near the circle, yelled at the group, "Go home! Nobody loves you!" to which the group replied to the RAs, "We love you!" The students then resumed the chant while going back to their dorms, as described above.

Further note: The "Go home, nobody loves you/we love you" exchange was commonplace at least as early as LAN.00.1. The exchange then moved to right after American Pie and before the Afterdance, but remained traditional.

Further further note: The "Go home, nobody loves you/we love you" exchange has been changed right after American Pie since at least the mid-1990's. It has not always, however, been chanted again after the Afterdance.

Some people have been known to chant the first line as "CTY has a nice butt," rather than using the words "you have."

Staff Variants

In at least the last few years, increasing numbers of Instructional and Residential staff members have attended the Afterdance. Staff who watch the Afterdance at Lancaster often have to improvise new lyrics to some of the songs in order to preserve their closely-guarded moral authority. For example, some instructional staff members sing this version of the Beer Song:

In Heaven, there is no milk!
That's why we just drink Silk^TM!
And when we are gone from... hilk?
Our friends will be drinking all our milk!

This alternative version started during the second session of either 2004 or 2005. A new version of the third line might end up replacing the current version, but until then the staff members are focusing their efforts on thinking up a cleaned-up "line 3" of the "Cows are Freaky" song.

Adam Roush and other staff have also yelled an alternative version of the "CTY, You Have a Nice Butt!" chant (LAN.06.2):

CTY, YOU HAVE A NICE BRAIN!
CTY, WE RESPECT YOU!
KEEP ON YOUR CLOTHES, KEEP ON YOUR CLOTHES!
CTY, WE RESPECT YOU!

So far, no student has been heard shouting this version. This modification of the chant was probably popularized by Adam, but was proposed and chanted by a group of teaching assistants after one of the dances in the ASFC, when the students ended up chanting for a very long time due to the long lines to get over the bridge back to campus (and, in the process, disturbed some elderly people leaving a nearby restaurant). Other variants of the third line, such as "write me a poem," have also been proposed.

Carlisle

Sing the Star-Spangled Banner while walking back from a dance. [CAR.05,.06.1]

LMU

At the LMU site, when a dance ends, one of the RAs will go up on stage and scream out, "Go home! Nobody loves you! NOBODY!!!" This RA, as per tradition, is usually one of the celebrated Boring brothers, or the legendary Tom Ryan. In LMU 06.2, none of us had ever heard of this tradition, but JORGE LLAMAS started the tradition and made it immortal.

Skidmore

Session 1

I'll Make a Man Out of You, from Mulan

Everyone links shoulders and stand in a circle or line and sing Mulan's I'll Make a Man Out of You. The last DJ of the dance should put the song on. During the chorus all the nevermores say "Be a Man".

Let's get down to business - to defeat the Huns
Did they send me daughters when I asked for sons?
You're the saddest bunch I've ever met
But you can bet before we're through
Mister, I'll make a man out of you

Tranquil as a forest
But on fire within
Once you find your center
You are sure to win
You're a spineless, pale pathetic lot
And you haven't got a clue
Somehow I'll make a man out of you

I'm never gonna catch my breath
Say goodbye to those who knew me
Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym
This guy's got 'em scared to death
Hope he doesn't see right through me
Now I really wish that I knew how to swim

Chorus: Be a man (Nevermores only)
We must be swift as the coursing river
Be a man (Nevermores only)
With all the force of a great typhoon
Be a man (Nevermores only)
With all the strength of a raging fire
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

Time is racing toward us till the Huns arrive
Heed my every order and you might survive
You're unsuited for the rage of war
So pack up, go home you're through
How could I make a man out of you?

Chorus

Chorus