Memories:LAN

2004.1

The Most Adoptions Ever

Zev Hurwich currently holds the unchallenged record for being adopted 42 times in his squirrel year. The idea for this started due to his seeming dual adoption, first by Alexia Simmonard, and then by Jeremy Berkowitz. Zev and Jeremy discussed the possibility of being adopted more than once which led to the idea of being adopted 42 times. Zev and Jeremy, in the last week of 04.1, ran around the campus asking people to adopt Zev. The entire Alcove of 04.1 ended up adopting him, plus other random people around the site, leading to a final tally of 42 adoptions.

2005.1

Bad Posture

In Dan Salvato's Math Logic class in 2005.1, one of his friends noticed that Dan's shoulders were slouched down all the time. She brought it up with him, saying "Put your shoulders up, like this." Dan took note of this.

A year later, just before 2006.1, someone in school told Dan he had good posture. Dan was like "o.o" and then he was like ":D".

Holding the Door for 500 People

Dan Salvato and his friend Luyu were bored one day and they were sitting in the Schnader stairwell, between the front and back doors, just lightly talking. Noticing the many people walking in and out, Dan and Luyu began holding doors open for people. Dan couldn't help but notice that only certain people said "thank you" as they opened the door - this made him curious, and he decided to get creative.

Dan and Luyu relocated to the door coming in from Schnader porch, and their friend Andrey decided to join them. Together, the three of them held the door for anyone entering while counting each person who walked through; they also counted the number of "thank yous" received. Out of the 500 people they held the door open for, they received 255 "thank yous" - that's 55 percent. They also created a set of rules determining who says "thank you" and how it is said:

• RAs are much more likely to say "thank you" than students.
• Females are more likely to say "thank you" than males. This applies for students and RAs.
• If the walker is familiar with the door holder, he/she is less likely to say "thank you."
• People in a small group are unlikely to say "thank you" unless one person says it; in this case, the rest of the small group usually says "thank you" as well.
• People are more likely to say "thank you" if they witness the door holder opening the door.
• Unless a female RA, walkers are likely to say "thank you" quietly.
• Small groups are more likely to say "thank you" than large groups.
• Female RAs are most likely to smile when saying "thank you."

Change of Heart

Dan Salvato, the Son of the Holy Trinity in 2008.1, was ironically as non-traditionalist as possible during his first year in 2005.1. He had come to CTY during the lowest point of his three-year depression; he felt that CTY would give him a chance to start his life over with new people. Dan was generally happy at CTY, staying inside during dances to play cards and spending every Quad Time in his hall. However, his depression still affected him; he sometimes felt like everyone cared about each other more than Dan. Feeling that CTY was nothing special for him, he decided not to return the next year. He told this to his friend Ly, who was disappointed.

Because of a thunderstorm on the day of the last dance, all students were required to report to the ASFC, which Dan was unhappy about. However, he managed to play cards with his friends against the wall, despite the blaring Canon songs in the background. Eventually, though, Dan's card-playing friends dispersed, and Dan was left alone to sit against the wall. Nightswimming began to play, and Dan was terribly upset - he was all alone again, just like at home. But then he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up to see Artem, a onemore in his hall with a wonderful heart. He asked Dan what was wrong, only to get a shrug in return. Artem then said to Dan, "Hey, if there's something bothering you, you can always come to me to talk about it, and I'll be here to listen. I care about you, I want you to know that." A pat on the shoulder, and Artem was off.

This single trigger caused Dan to reconsider what he had so stubbornly been so sure of for the past three years. He realized that maybe there were people out there - people who could care and listen; people who could love. After a lot of self-debate, Dan replaced each negative thought of his with something positive and motivational. His depression was over. On the last day, when Ly asked Dan to sign her shirt, Dan happily obliged and wrote his name, and underneath his name, a message: "I'll be back."

2006.1

The Forty Two Person Grass Orgy

In Lancaster 06.1 during the first week of CTY when hand holding was still considered quite promiscuous Teh Corner decided to start a grass orgy. They had already been reprimanded for similar conduct but they hoped that they could get away with it. Then realizing that the more people who joined the orgy the less likely they were to get into trouble so members of Teh Corner kept inviting random people to join the orgy. When the orgy had past around 23 people the idea came into the minds of those present to achieve a forty two person grass orgy. Within a few minutes they had achieved the ultimate grass orgy and not a single one got yelled at by any member of staff.

Evil Vending Machine

One weekend, Dan Salvato and a few friends in his hall were bored. As all bored people do, they began climbing on top of the vending machine in their kitchen. Wondering if it was light enough to move, about five people positioned themselves around the vending machine. To their surprise, they managed to move it! Having fun with the whole situation, they pushed it in front of the doorway, blocking entrance to the kitchen. They wanted to give the vending machine a more menacing look, so they gave it an angry face made out of duct tape. The evil vending machine remained in place for several hours.

RA Jeff was walking down the hall when something red caught his eye. Turning left, he found himself face-to-face with a vending machine, smiling at him mischeivously. He stood there for about five seconds, smiling to himself, before saying "Okay, can you guys move it back now?"

The vending machine became the basis of the signature panels in the 2006 yearbook for both Etse's and Jeff's halls. (If you have a 2006 yearbook, check it out!) Here is a photo of the vending machine.

2006.2

Sexapussy (The Sexapus)

During Second Saturday of 2006.02, Crafting the Essay 3C student Ashok was getting bored as the day was dragging on to around 4:00, the end of the activities. Hallmate Greg Lawrence IV had had some twisty balloons mailed to him, and Ashok had collected 2 balloons so far that Greg had left lying around, presumed to be broken. Upon returning to his room, Ashok suddenly had an idea: he would make a balloon octopus! Quickly, Ashok scoured the hall for 2 more balloons. Alas, he only found one more, but not to be deterred, he used the 3 balloons he had to make a six-armed octopus. And thus Sexapussy, The Sexapus, was born.

Ashok took the Sexapus to the 3rd Dubbs lounge, which was at the top floor of South Ben and very hot. As the people in the lounge started playing with Sexapussy, a few were interested in how slowly it fell. Noticing that there were several fans cooling the room, Ashok and RA Adam Roush set up 3 fans pointing upwards and dropped Sexapussy into the current. For the next half-hour or so, Sexapussy would float to the top of the room, then flip and fall, then flip and spin around several times while catching the air currents and floating upwards again. In summary, it would float, flip, and spin without touching the ground for several minutes at a time, and it looked really cool. Word of the Sexapus got around quickly, and many people came up to 3rd Dubbs to see the balloon creature. Unfortunately, someone jostled one of the fans before a good video could be taken, and it couldn't be put quite in the same position so that the Sexapus would float as long again. Later, Adam and some others tied inflated plastic bags onto 3 of Sexapussy's 6 arms, which made it float much slower and longer.

Sexapussy suffered the same unfortunate fate that all balloons must, unfortunately, but plans for a bigger setup are under way.

P.S. we all secretly (or not so secretly) want to have the sexapussy's babies. its true. ~Yulia speaking for all of CTY who witnessed the glory that was Sexapussy.

Years later, a live "hexapus" was found in a British aquatic zoo.

The Legend of The Ivan

For those of you who don't know (i.e. those of you who weren't in Archaeology or Advanced Chem 06.2), this is the legend of The Ivan, collaborate on by Lena and AmanDaray (Amanda Ray).

It unfolds thusly: Soon after arrival at CTY, Amandar and Lena conversed and became friends. Of the myriad unusual and nerdy things discussed, the subject soon veered towards sex, drugs, communists and other such risque business (as CTY conversations have a knack for doing). Amandar brought forth the idea of locating an individual on campus to stalk for the remainder of the session, an idea that was met with enthusiasm from the not yet "attached-at-the-hip-and-left-knee-to-Kib" [The origin of this quotation remains uncertain] Lena. Walking past the arches, Lena spotted a more than adequate stalkee and rushed to inform Amandar of the charming new development.

The two giddily overeager students and some friends they told about the stalkee stared at, "casually" walked by, and giggled uncontrollably at and around him for excessive amounts of time. He was of slim build, dark hair, and pasty complexion. On some occasions, he wore grey Asics of the same style as Lena's. He was often seen carrying an "indie" messenger bag and reading books while eating meals instead of socializing, like an "emo" student would. He often appeared very pensive and existential (if it is possible for one to look existential). He had a Russian look about him, and was soon dubbed a communist. At breakfast, Lena once remarked that he looked as if he should be at a coffee shop or vintage record store "like, in Belgium or somewhere!" which prompted the notion that he was a stereotypical Kerouac-esque beat traveler, and all of his books were written by Nietzsche, Camus, Ginsberg, and Palahniuk. Upon writing a report on fourteenth-century Russia in class, Lena researched Ivan the Terrible and immediately decided that the stalkee's name must be Ivan, Nikolai, or Sven or "something swanky like that." Ivan was preferred by Amandar and the matter was settled.

At first, since he was too old to be a camper, and looked too mystical and worldly to be a TA or teacher (and obviously wasn't an RA), Amandar was misled to believe that he was a random F&M college student crashing CTY meals for unknown, mysterious reasons. Soon thereafter, one of the CTYers involved in the stalkage discovered that he did, in fact, have a black lanyard. This prompted Amandar to drag a whining Lena to the bulletin board outside the Nurse's office in Thomas where the pictures of RAs and TAs were posted. To both girls' dismay, the elusive stalkee's picture was ripped from the board, probably by a first session CTYer. They did, however, discover his real name, Nicolas (surprisingly close to Nikolai!), and that he TAed MIND B.

By the third week, Ivan probably was well aware that he was being stalked, especially since an involved CTYer, Kristin, decided to approach him and strike up a conversation which promptly failed. Lena had kind of forgotten about him by this point, but Amandar was still recruiting stalkers to join the rapidly growing cult of Ivanites. She hopes Ivan will return next year so the tradition can be passed on, but they probably freaked him out too much, in addition to everyone in MIND B. Apparently, no one in MIND B had caught on that their TA was being stalked by everyone in ARCH, CHEM, and a few random people from paleo and other classes.

Here is a strategically taken picture of Ivan and Amandar's shoulder by another A-Chem student:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v342/fefifofelen/cty/2lan06/5da2re2.jpg

Jeff Sachs says:

 As a member of Mind B. I am completely shocked that people were stalking Nicolas "Fries"
 Friesner. Although I did read some interesting Dr. Uffy, Fries, Lectern, fanfics...

Laney Newhouse says:

 DO NOT LISTEN TO JEFF SACHS. THAT IS A LIE. THERE WAS NO FANFICTION WRITTEN ABOUT DR. UFFIE, FRIES   
 OR THE LECTERN, AND CERTAINLY NOT ABOUT THE THREE OF THEM ENGAGING IN ILLICIT ACTIVITIES TOGETHER. 
 However, I, too, am very much amused by the stalkage of our beloved TA, and would like to note that 
 a lot of members of our class stalked him as well, as they found him quite attractive and soulful.

Amanda Ray says:

 'Twas the great Amandar herself who discovered the black lanyard, silly Lena.

Waffle House

On the last day of CTY, two CTY'ers, Harrison and Jordan, thought it would be a good idea to go to the waffle House on Harrison's last day at CTY. The plan was to sneak out and leave the exterior door to the dorm building propped open with a flip flop (as they had already returned their key fobs). They made it past Turkey Hill and into the Waffle House, where they had a lovely breakfast, and stopped at a convenience store to buy some disallowed caffeinated products (an energy drink and caffeinated gum). They then attempted to call their dorm neighbor, Andrew, from a payphone, but he wasn't awake. On their way back, they were stopped by the Lancaster police for being out past curfew. After trying unsuccessfully to pass themselves off as townies, they were carted back to F&M, where they were summarily grilled about what exactly they had done. While the administration couldn't do much to Harrison, as he was a nomore and it was the last day of the session, Jordan was not allowed to come back for his nomore year.

D-Qwon

D-Qwon (the hyphen is important because otherwise one may think it's pronounced "deh-qwon") is a lamppost at Lancaster, closest to North Ben, and near the arches.

CTYers mainly in Crafting the Essay B and C spent their Quad Times of the first week of LAN.06.2 basking in its light before realizing that... well, lampposts have feelings too. It was then that Johnny Mondel named the lamppost D-Qwon and, through some telepathic means, learned of his life. D-Qwon and his brother Dupree [whose body lay dying during 06.2, but has since been buried] were inner city lampposts who set out on a journey to Lancaster. D-Qwon, being the luckier brother, arrived on the Franklin & Marshall campus alive, but Dupree didn't have the same fate and was destroyed by the construction of Ware.

On the first weekend in 06.2, with he help of Ellie Kladky's iPod speakers, the first D-Qwon Dance Party occurred, in which people sat around, listened to music, and of course, danced. Following this first D-Qwon Dance Party, any weekend time these CTYers spent hanging out and dancing to music, regardless of the place on the Quad, became known as a D-Qwon Dance Party.

It is believed by many that the drawing on the back of the LAN 06.2 "year"book is of D-Qwon.

External Links

• A photo of D-Qwon with Dupree in the background

2007.1

Be Strong

Dan Salvato cried very much on the last day of 2007.1. It was his last time in his room with his roommate Zev Hurwich. Dan had just finished packing and was about to leave; he gave Zev one last hug and began to cry again. Zev let go and Dan began backing out of the door. "Dan..." Zev said. "...Be strong." Zev smiled and held up a fist of strength to Dan. Dan sniffled and couldn't help but smile back - he held up his own fist in return. He then turned around and walked out of his hall for the last time. This was the most dramatic and epic moment of Dan's life - it was straight out of a movie. Only better...

Balcony Incidents

The only person to witness the balcony incident was Dan Salvato. The entire campus was on its way to the ASFC to watch the annual Talent Show. Dan, however, was a performer in the Talent Show and was preparing to depart with the other performers, who were grouped in Thomas Hall. A Rubik's Cube was needed as a prop for one of the MC acts, and Dan was asked to run back to his dorm in North Ben to get his cube as quickly as possible. At the front of North Ben were three RAs (Dan does not remember who) - two were at ground level, and one was a floor up on the balcony. All three RAs were laughing as the bottom two RAs attempted to toss a lanyard up to the RA on the balcony - they missed several times, and the lanyard fell back down. This is a major rule violation and would get all the balconies banned if any of the RAs caught students tossing anything up or down the balcony. It was very funny for Dan to watch, but unfortunately, he couldn't think of anything witty to say to the RAs at the time. He returned to Thomas Hall with the Rubik's Cube, and the RAs were never caught by anyone else.

There was a second incident leading to the near-banning of the Muhlenburg/Mull balcony and possibly all other balconies due to the throwing of sprinkles off it. This occurred after the 4th dance while everyone was coming in from the afterdance. The two perpetrators were stopped by two CTY students because they did not want the balconies to be banned. The following day, an RA noticed and called a hall meeting for Muhlenburg and Mull to try to figure out what happened. The RA accused these two halls because they were the only ones with sprinkles.The punishment would be having to clean up other halls. Luckily, one of the two students that stopped the two perpetrators was in one of these halls, and told his RA what he saw. The perpetrators were caught and the balconies stayed open, and the halls were not punished. One perpetrator was from outside the hall, and his punishments are unknown.

2008.1

Dan's Disappointment Speech

A transcription of the speech can be found here: Essay:Dan's Disappointment Speech

Dan Salvato spent 2008.1, his nomore year of CTY, involved with tradition and the Alcove more than ever. When heading out of a lounge in North Ben during the first Saturday, he saw his two friends, Alex "Sasha" Ayvazov and Rowan Matney, in the distance. Sasha looked upset; Dan asked what was wrong upon approaching them. Sasha explained that he did not feel as much of a sense of love and family in the Alcove as he always had in the past; Dan and Sasha talked about this together for a while and agreed that something should be done to unite the Alcove as a family. Thus, they decided to write a speech to give to the Alcove the following Tuesday during dinner. When Sasha had to go, he hugged Dan and said "I love you, Dan." Dan started to cry, as this was the first true sense of love and family he was given during 2008.1.

NOTE: The Alcove and its sense of family is a very touchy and debatable subject, mainly in terms of whether the Alcove has lost a sense of family over the years, whether it has become less of a family after 2007.1 when Zev and others nomored out, or whether it has always been the same but was given a goal in 2008.1 that was not upheld to the fullest of expectations. This entry only covers the interpretations of Dan, Sasha, and the written speech.

Dan and Sasha spent several quad times and early mornings working on the speech. The original idea of the speech was that the Alcove contained a strong sense of family in the past, but this was failing in 2008.1. Dan consulted Dana Reback after the completion of the speech; he was glad he did, because she was involved in the Alcove for four years and believed that the sense of family was never truly given in the Alcove any more in the past, but was rather a new perspective the Alcove wanted to uphold for 2008.1. Dan spent his quad time rewriting the speech and went over it with Sasha Tuesday morning.

After a long talk with the Site Director, Dan was ready to give the speech, though he was incredibly nervous. Upon quieting down the Alcove, he got their attention by opening with the sentence "A few of us have been disappointed this year at CTY." From here, he was able to deliver the rest of the speech; a few people were in tears at the end, including Dan himself. The speech was awarded with a lively applause, followed by each member of the Alcove hugging Dan one by one. The Alcove then formed a circle by linking their arms around each others' shoulders, singing the Beatles' "Hey Jude." Dan left the Alcove crying and was stopped by Frank Wang, sitting with several other RAs. Frank asked Dan what was wrong, and Dan said "I just gave my speech" in between sniffles. Frank reached out his arm to pat Dan on the back, but Dan moved closer and gave Frank a hug (Frank said "Okay, okay" in slight disapproval).

"42 is a great number, but if it means one more person can join in, 43 is even greater."

Brotime

On the talent show program, an act midway through the set was listed only as "Brotime." This act turned out to be five male RAs (Tom, Diego, Papa Pucci, Joe, and Scruff) dancing to Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go," leading to much laughter and many cheers from the female students. The next day, at the final dance, "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" was played. As soon as it was started, there were many yells of "BROTIME!", people cleared the blacktop, and the fivesome performed. Then, at closing ceremonies, two encore acts from the talent show were scheduled; Dan Salvato, Alan He, and Victor Song's breakdancing, and Sarah Hackney, Sarah Parr, and Rachel Khatan's singing and playing Scarborough Fair. The breakdancing went over well (besides the fact that the iPod's battery died mid-performance), but before the Scarborough Fair act went on, there was a small scuffle between Sarah H.'s guitar and a member of the History of Disease class, which ended with one of the guitar strings breaking, rendering it unplayable. Therefore, Sarah had to rush to get a spare, leaving a large time gap. Some students yelled "Brotime!" and weren't taken seriously at first, but when more students called for Brotime, RA Mama Kate asked if anyone in the ASFC had Wham on their iPod. Both Byron Callan and Jeremy Strege donated their iPods and Brotime put on one final performance for the CTYers and parents. They received a standing ovation.

Brotime on Youtube- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uSfgAx5flA

"Hey, Shae!"

During a break in Rocky Horror rehearsal on Second Saturday, certain students who here shall remain unnamed (due both to lack of consent from both parties and also full group LAN 08.1 memory of the event anyways) engaged in flagrant violation of PDA rules. Unbeknownst to them, RA Shae (still fully in drag) entered Mull/Muhlenberg 2nd lounge, with a full view of them from the door. It took a few tries from other students to get their attention, but once they realized Shae was there, one student immediately jumped off the other and onto the chair arm, and essentially hid behind a combination of knees and carefully-draped hair. Suddenly, jumbled excuses were heard from various unknown parts of the lounge about "part of the rehearsal" and "in the lab...on the slab!" Shae, who appeared somewhat startled, seemed to accept these excuses, and then said something about having to go get Adam Roush to watch the rehearsal, followed by what seemed like a plea: "Please don't make out anymore...!" After Shae's exit, the two students were ridiculed. This ridicule continued for the rest of the session, by changing the practice of directing the words "Hey, Frank!" to the air behind a PDA-ing couple with "Hey, Shae!" especially for this particular couple.

Edit: Most of this information is, quite surprisingly, 100 % accurate. I must interject to defend myself, however, because I totally didn't believe the excuses of said students at the time. Not at all. They were clearly not "in the lab, on the slab," as implied. They were in an armchair, being CTYI. I was just too gobsmacked to act otherwise. --Shae 10:14, 25 November 2008 (PST)

Shae- I know you didn't believe them but it was more fun to write it that way. It would have been even more fun if I had thought to describe you as "gobsmacked". -Rachel

Balcony Mishaps

The balcony of Rauch 3 was a place of mishaps and mayhem during LAN.08.01. The ETYM girls were often reprimanded for their interesting and slightly CTYI beheavior on side jutting precipice. The beginning of this saga was the Dangling of the Bra, during the Sunday Lockdown. A moth killed with a shoe mistaken for a gunshot put the whole campus under house arrest, but the girls of Rauch 3 had a religious RA, and therefore were barely informed through sparse text messages. During the lockdown, a bra was torn from the body of an unsuspecting ETYM-ite and dangled off the balcony, upon which very angry RAs/Policeman ordered the girls inside and the bra off its makeshift flagpole.

This was not the only offense, however. One night during lights out, one of the girls was talking on the phone on the balcony, when two attractive (yes... they were attractive. We could tell. It doesn't matter that it was dark. Shhhhhh) men were spotted walking through the campus. NAKED. Well... in boxers, but close enough. Being the true Rauch 3 girls they were, catcalling erupted and the boys walked over to talk. But right before numbers could be exchanged, the half-naked boys were caught by an RA and escorted off the premises, into the land of legend.

The last incident took place when a CTYer was reciting a sonnet rather loudly off the balcony into the night. A couple heading towards Weiss Hall shouted, "SHUT UP!!!" To which the response was, "It's Shakespeare, you illiterate manwhore!!!" But who should be walking by at that very moment but DRL Scary Matt? So, you can guess what happened next - yes. Failure. But a little Catholic girl wrote an apology and everything was right as rain. Suspicious? Maybe. Ingenious? Yes.

Frank Wang: Owned Via PDA

It was the last dance of session 1 and CTYer X and CTYer Y were kissing near the back of the dance crowd. Suddenly, Frank Wang came by, and he shouted "No PDA!" Lo and behold, however, he was shouting to an unsuspecting couple right nearby CTYers X and Y, not X and Y themselves. Frank began to reprimand the victims verbally, and CTYer Y interjected, politely commending Frank on his excellent work catching the PDAers. It was then, when Frank began to go into full swing lecture, that CTYers X and Y kissed for a long time, right behind the great Frank Wang's back. It was a satisfying, triumphant moment never to be forgotten.

When Frank Wang turned back to face them, "lock down" mode was initiated, and both X and Y faced away and shouted, "Ew!!! Cooties!"

Thus, Frank Wang had been owned.

The Name Train

The Name Train was a horrible evil devised by an RA as a method to supposedly help CTYers learn each others' names, but was truthfully a nightmarish form of torture. It dates back to as early as the first day of 08.1, being used as an ice breaker, but it began to become more well-known during the very first hall bonding, in which it wickedly ruined the bonding of many other halls. Sporadically throughout the rest of the session, the Name Train was revived, causing many CTYers to flee in fear when it approached.

"What's YOUR name on the Name Train?!"

"...Debbie?"

"DEBBIE! DEBBIE! DEBBIE-DEBBIE-DEBBIE! Hop on the Name Train!!"

The Name Train's reign of evil was broken, however, when a group of CTYers determined to stop it planned to join the train with really long names, like Riki-Tiki-Tembo-No-Sarendo-Terry-Berry-Ruchi-Pip-Beri-Pembo, obscene names, like Mike Hunt, or simply a few hundred digits of pi. The plan of action was changed when Zoe stated that any name train that attempted to kidnap her would be promptly Rickrolled, and held up her ever-present portable speakers. Inspired, Christine suggested that the whole group simply gather together in an acapella Rickroll, and thus the Wall of Rolling Rickroll was born. The Name Train was Rickrolled three times before the Wall scattered and fled, but the damage had been done. The Name Train was no more.

EDIT: The Name Train lives on! Several 2nd sessioners jumped on board. In fact, Katherine's girls requested to be Name Trained on the first day! AND! a lot of you 1st sessioners loved the Name Train! So much so that we had to establish a regular schedule — the 6:10 Name Train. (RA, Andrew Dillon)

EDIT: Andrew, I have to defend the honor of my hall by stating that it was actually MY girls that requested to be Name Trained. Specifically Kleo and Kate. Because the Transformers rock. --Shae 10:14, 25 November 2008 (PST)

EDIT: The acapella Rickroll was one of my favorite memories that I had Session 1. -Austin

EDIT: On Second Saturday of 09.1, James "Turtle" Buckland started a pre-dance Name Train, which managed to gather about 25 people. This Name Train was destroyed by Sam Bauman who, upon asking of his name, screamed "YOU! SHALL NOT! PASS!" and charged the Name Train, breaking it apart.

Best Typo of the Year

In the middle of the session, one of the activities on the Activity Sheet appeared as "Hot Bo and Tom With Balls." This was laughed about for the remainder of the session by many. The activity was meant to be "Hit Bo and Tom With Balls" (dodgeball). It may or may not have been an accident. *coughcough*

The Schnade, The Chart, and The Health Office Party

During first session, a nasty cold quickly spread throughout the Alcove and the campus. (this cold was so nasty that it even sent one girl to the ER) It was spread quickly because the person who first caught a bad case was in -close contact- with many people. She was quarantined in the Health Office for two and a half days, only allowed out for meals and activities. During lunch of the first day, she, along with a few of her friends who were already showing symptoms, created a sick table to contain the illness, and created a Schnade chart. This chart showed how the cold would spread, AKA it showed the people who were already sick, and the people closest to them, the people closest to them, etc. As more and more people got sick, their names were checked off of the list. That Friday, this girl had to stay in the Health Office during the dance. She was feeling better, so she grabbed the candy she had left from Turkey Hill and the previous week's Farmers Market, so she could make her own party in the Health Office. When she got there, she realized that three of her friends were also still sick and stuck in the Health Office. They sat in the suite lounge eating candy and hanging out for the entire dance. During the night, they had visitors pop in for water and just for fun, including friendly RA's Shae and Sean and even SRA Frank Wang. Frank, after letting the no longer deathly sick girl sign up early for the Farmer's Market, showed a side of himself not usually seen by CTYers.

"Man, you guys all look really sick" Frank

"...uh... yea.. well we are.. pretty much..." CTYers

"No, you don't get it... like, SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK" Frank, striking a pose

In the moment, it was so funny that one girl fell off the couch laughing and took a few minutes to calm down. She's having trouble right now finding the words to explain the hilarity of the situation. All in all, the four sick friends in the Health Office had fun with each other, with friends, RA's, SRA's, with the chart, and made the best out of this potentially horrible situation.

Unfortunately, due to his illness during the Lip Sync Contest, Dan Salvato was unable to perform a romantic broadway-themed dance to the Pokemon Theme Song (which he spent weeks choreographing before CTY) with his partner Margaret Rigg, so the performance was canceled.

Schnader Hall Lockdown

Since it's been almost a year since this happened, I feel like this famous event should be recorded before too many of us forget.

It was a lazy second sunday morning on the 3rd floor of Schnader Hall, and I had just finished taking a shower. I was chilling, talking to people, and waiting for brunch to be served. As several of us were lounging in Schnader's 3rd floor lounge, an RA from a lower floor came up the stairs and said something hearing gunshots. Confused, we all sat there for a moment, and continued about our business. Around 2 minutes later, my RA, Rob came in and said to everybody, "Everybody get to your rooms, we are on lockdown. Someone heard gunshots." Now we were very nervous. We all scrambled to our rooms and shut the doors tight. Unfortunately, my room was locked. I tried my key, but nothing happened. Luckily, Rob was still in the hallway and asked what I was doing. I then told hime what happened, and he whacked on the door a couple times, calling the person to open the door. Now I had no idea what had happened. Maybe the gunman had taken cover in my room and had barricaded himself in there! Luckily, moments later, a screeching could be heard and my door opened. I am not going to reveal who it was in there, to protect his privacy, even though many of you already know who it is. Nervous as crap by now, I dashed inside my room. For some reason though, my dorm window was open and the person was shouting to somebody outside. Fearing for our safety, I tried to close the window, when I realized the person was holding a phone and talking to a cop. Really scared now, I backed away to my bed. Seconds later, I heard a knocking. Looking through the peephole of my door I see three police officers with body armor, and Police version M1 carbines. Relieved, I opened the door. They soon began asking us what had happened. The caller said that he had heard gunshots, laughing, and a cry of "Is he dead? Is he dead?" By this point, the caller was extremely upset, and they figured it would be better off if they asked him questions in private. They allowed me and my roommate to return to our room. 5 minutes later, an announcement was made, and certain dorms were allowed to go to brunch. Naturally, many of us thought thought that this was incredibly stupid. As far as we knew, there was still a gunman somewhere out on the campus. Grouping America's future together in one crowded cafeteria seemed to be very unwise. Little did we know, that a clear signal was tentatively given, and they figured that we should at least eat. For the first time, we were allowed to talk to other people about what had happened. As we talked, a slow realization came upon me. I knew what the caller had heard! Earlier that day, someone had walked into our lounge from our microwave room, laughing hysterically. When we asked him why he was laughing so hard, he told us what happened. He, along with others, had been trying to kill a moth. They had managed to chase the moth into the microwave, and effectively cooked it. He noted that it had made a popping sound. We of course, thought nothing of it at the time and remarked how each of us would never use the microwave again. Returning from this flashback, I unveiled my conclusion. There was never any gunshots at all! It was instead the popping of the moth in the microwave! This theory was not exactly correct however, as I never heard about a flip flop being involved. But this theory was the catalyst in figuring out what had happened. Later, we were able to piece together exactly what had happened. Several people were in the Microwave room. In there, they saw a moth. As Schnader Hall 3rd floor is infested with moths, the leaped at the opportunity to kill it. Literally. They had been jumping up all over the place, using flip flops to kill it but often missing. The resulting miss still hit the wall though, and I am sure that everybody is familiar with the sound of a flipflop hitting a surface at a fast speed. They were laughing, asking if it was dead in loud voices, and just causing a ruckus. I however, heard none of this as it happened. Meanwhile in my room, the caller had awoken from a sleepover from the previous night. He awoke to the sound of loud popping, laughing, and cries of "Is it dead yet?". Naturally, being half-asleep and a squirrel, he panicked. He dialed 911 and reported gunshots in Schnader hall. And that is where my story began.

Epilogue: On one of the last days of CTY, the caller received a package. It was a hat and a certificate from the Lancaster police department. The certificate was one of thanks for "cool thinking and fast action in the face of potential crisis." or something like that. The best possible response to this goes to Ben Levy: "Cool thinking? What the hell? That wasn't cool thinking at all, he thought that people trying to kill a moth were crazed gunmen!!!!"

2008.2

Pantsless Macarena Line

During the final dance of Session 2, the songs Sexy Back and BLT were played back to back. The Macarena and Sexy Back had been combined at CTY before, but not in a manner such as this. Following BLT, a small group of students rushed to the ASFC track where it overlooked the dance floor. They then began to form a Macarena line similar to the one formed at the last dance in the ASFC, but with one vital difference: their pants had been left off following BLT. As the song went on, the line grew, until only a small portion of the dancers were pantsless, the other ones either wearing dresses, or leaving their pants on. And that was how the Pantsless Macarena Line was born.

Previous to this, the Macarena was also done during other rap-ish songs as well. Thus, during (I believe) the 3rd dance, the Macarena was played, but although some were actually doing the Macarena, a line of people refused to dance the Macarena to the correct song and instead performed the Generic Gangster Dance directly in front of the Macarena-ers.

-This is entirely true. I was part of both of these. FJØRKËN 13:55, 20 August 2008 (PDT)

2009.1

400 Babies!

During 2009.1, a new rule was introduced that banned hugging for more than three seconds. This was not received well by the CTY community, and some started to make jokes about this. One popular joke was that it couldn't be fear of girls getting pregnant, because we were all educated people there and we knew how it actually worked. So, it must have been fear of the guys getting pregnant. Declan Kennedy, inspired by the PowerThirst commercial, mounted a plan to be hugged for longer than 3 seconds 400 times by the end of second session. He had gotten 400 long before the end of first. No idea when those babies are going to show up.

Pie Through the Window

During 2009, a swine flu scare sent many students home. Rudy Garcia was kept in the health office for a very long time because the admin and his parents had to arrange transportation back to California. He was there so long that his symptoms disappeared, but Baltimore ruled that he had to go home anyway and that he could not have visitors. Some enterprising friends of his began talking to him through the Health Office window. On the second Thursday, some Alcovians were talking to him through the windows. Zoe M. then played the Dr. Mario dance off her speakers, and Rudy and the Alcovians did it. After Dr. Mario, Zoe started playing "American Pie" for Rudy, because he would not get to attend another dance. The Alcovians and Rudy's friends then did a full rendition of it, albeit with some switched positions because the official ones were not there. (Erik Goldberg as the Jester, Zoe as the queen/Fire, Bill Fedullo as king/Jack Flash.) There was no Afterdance because of everyone having to go to class, but Rudy seemed very happy. There were also plans to go and American Pie sick nomore Colin Stanfill, but his parents picked him up before that could happen.

Pacman

See Second Sunday.

The Walking Afterdance

On second Saturday, a variety of unfortunate things occurred at the dance that are discussed in detail on the Hall of Shame. The last of these was the appearance of lightning, which caused the RAs to begin ushering students back to their dorms. Instead of abandoning the Afterdance for one night, there occurred a walking afterdance that was incredibly surreal as well as incredibly awesome, everyone shouting the songs with such emotional intensity that, to this editor, captured the feeling of CTY perfectly.

Walking Afterdances have continued to occur whenever there is lightning after the dances.

Dimbyism

Once upon a time, there was an awesome Number Theory TA called Dimby. He developed a cult following in class, which spread across campus via a loud and rancorous song. Indeed, the THEO.B class loved their Dimby so much that they developed a variation of a famous and ages-old Number Theory song (only the Dimbytized variation of which will be written here):

We have Dimby
Great big Dimby
Teaching through night
Not beautiful sight
We have Dimby
Great big Dimby
YYYYYAAAHH!

Other variations of the song were created, notably one about a cripple. The original song itself could be heard, as usual, resounding across the quad on many-a-day. The Dimby version was particularly audible on the last CTY Friday, when the THEO.B class transported Dimby to Keiper held aloft on a pool mattress. Dimby himself became a widely recognized person among many CTYers (his appearance at a dance resulted in over fifty nearby students bowing down to him in supplication), and his glory has converted many students to Dimbyism.

During second session, the THEO.A class, also sang this song, (but we didn't know that this song existed already), replacing trucking with proving, and the fourth line staying the same. Awkward thing is, that we called our religion Dimbyism as well... We must have a special connection.

The Artificial Creation of a Meme

On one of the last days of 2009.1, some campers sat down in LLRT and decided that they would create a meme just to see how fast it would spread. The meme was this: The sentence "1 part cranberry, 2 parts orange juice, 5 parts root beer, it's delicious!" repeated as quickly and as often as possible. It was spread throughout the campus until most, if not all, people had heard of it. It is a prime example of the memetic effect of information propagating throughout a society for no purpose other than the lulz.

2010.1

TOPI Insanity, or, TOPI BOYS <3 THE PEEN

The Utopias and Dystopias class of 2010.1 became quite notorious for their general rowdiness, overwhelming love for naked time, and the fact that all the boys in the class were either gay, bisexual, or otherwise attracted to males. The default state of the TOPI girls in their hall in South Schnader 2 was partially naked, sometimes fully naked, like during one particular sleepover that began with a game of strip never have I ever. The war chant of TOPI was to simply shout NAKED TIME!, and several other TOPI classmates would invariably respond with cheers and more NAKED TIME. Ironically, the one time four TOPI girls ended up in the same shower stall, three of them were fully clothed.

The TOPI girls played an unending stream of ruthless pranks on each other, which terrified their hallmates, the Crafting the Essay A girls, and stimulated intense hatred in the Physics B girls, who lived across the hall and were disgusted by the TOPI girls' lack of conservatism. One TOPI girl played a stream of pranks on a second one who couldn't poop when others were in the bathroom, like dumping an entire bottle of baby powder on her head while she was pooping or taking pictures of her over the stall wall. A pair of roommates kept up a humorous war throughout the session; one was afraid of Jello, one was afraid of feet. One day after dinner the first girl entered her room to discover that her roommate had smuggled six cups of Jello out of the dining hall and dumped them all on her bed. The next morning, the second girl was woken up by the first girl's feet in her face. Eventually, Jello was thrown, Silly String was shot, and the rest of the hall was so inspired by the chaos that water ices were smushed in faces and people were attacked with shaving cream.

Other antics involved two TOPI girls running around Schnader in a nothing but underwear and a large tube of fabric, declaring themselves to be a chinese dragon, followed by a girl in a leopard snuggie, for no reason other than that snuggies are awesome. TOPI often ended up down in the South Schnader basement to visit the CODE C girls, who expressed extreme appreciation for naked time and TOPI in general. CODE girls often visited TOPI girls and in one instance pelted them with duct tape while the TOPI girls were being yelled at by SRA Megan. It should be noted that the CODE C girls in question had almost decided to come up shirtless but did not. The crypto girls expressed their extreme remorse for not doing so afterward for it would have made for intense hilarity. TOPI girls had nightly illegal sleepovers; one girl slept in her own bed all of three nights throughout the entire session. Late-night illegal sleepover activities included throwing paper airplanes covered with sexual innuendoes out the window and pelting one TOPI girl with full water bottles when she refused to get off the phone with her boyfriend.

Many TOPI rooms were decorated with bras (or in one case, a chastity belt made out of duct tape) hanging from the ceiling. The large quoteboard page hanging in the hallway, meant for doodles, was adorned with the large statements "NAKED TIME 22:00," "BOYS IN TOPI <3 THE PEEN, ESPECIALLY IN THEIR ORFICES," and "I WANT TO DO DIRTY THINGS TO YOUR MOIST BUTTHOLE." A book of gay erotica (purchased at a used bookstore for $5) was kept hidden in someone's dorm room, only to emerge for dramatic readings during sleepovers, and on the last day the receipt for its purchase turned up mysteriously covered in baby oil. A TOPI girl had a phobia of the words moist and musky; as a result, Betty Crocker Warm Delights (THE BEST THINGS EVER) were referred to as Moist Delights for the whole session and the word musk was thrown in whenever possible, especially in reference to vaginas.

The ridiculousness was not limited to the TOPI girls. The TOPI boys' extreme sexuality and touchy-feely-ness forced their instructor to make a rule allowing only one boy to go to the bathroom at a time. A regular reprimand of the class was for them all to stop touching each other, and at any possible time TOPI held indoor grass orgies in the center of the classroom. Just like the TOPI girls. TOPI boys did some awesome/highly CTY-I things. From gaorgies to taping the door of their RA shut, mattress dominos, and more gaorgies. One day when activities were rained out, the TOPI boys held a Ke$ha dance party in their bathroom. They were only told to stop when their RA realized that Ke$ha's "Blah Blah Blah" isn't exactly the most CTY-A song.

Three TOPI-ers famously got sent to the DRL during the third dance for "simulating oral sex" on a fourth TOPI-er, when in reality they were merely having their picture taken while pretending to nom on his butt. While the three spent an hour in DRL Bree's office, a rumor spread throughout the dance that they had been sent to the office for licking people's elbows, a result of the elbow-licking craze that had started in TOPI and spread through the rest of the campus. Continuing the trend of rule-breaking (by the end of the session, TOPI had broken more rules than it had followed), five TOPI girls got busted for an illegal sleepover on the third Monday and for punishment were made to clean up the dining hall for 15 minutes after breakfast and dinner. The punishment ended up being ridiculously enjoyable, and the girls became BFFs with Earl, the totally awesome man who checked for CTY IDs at the entrance. The punishment became known retroactively as the funishment.

2010.2

The Great 599

Muhlenberg 2 10.2 was a rather special hall, being both a THEO hall and a TOPI hall. This combination of two classes with reputations for attracting hardcore CTYers meant this hall had great things in store for it.

One of the stunts best remembered by the hall came to be known as "The Great 599". Through various channels, the hall was able to acquire a total of 600 off-brand copies of the famous red Solo Cup (Kroger brand, to be precise, and there were some blue ones too). One night, following lights out, much of Muhlenberg 2 left their rooms, and set to work.

Using the 27 gallons of water that Ryan and Noah had collected in various empty bottles and jugs, as well as an additional 33 gallons from jugs refilled during the prank, the hall outside Blaise's door was full within the hour. And so began the waiting game. Most of the hall expected Blaise to wake up late, after they had already gone to class. However, unbeknownst to the hall, Blaise had been out on patrol that night.

Around 2:00 in the morning, Blaise returned to his hall, two members of the prank team waiting in the lounge in hopes of catching his reaction. As Blaise asked them why they were in the lounge, they silently led him through the door into the hall itself. Their celebratory cries alerted the rest of the hall, who congregated outside to see the reaction. After he had been sufficiently pranked, a path was cleared in the cups for Blaise to walk through. Once he had gotten into his room, a few of those involved took it upon themselves to fix the prank. They emptied out all of the cups and stacked them in the bathroom, leaving one solitary cup sitting outside of Blaise's room. They then retired to the lounge to eat ramen with a glowstick until they passed out at various wee hours of the morning.

One member of the hall, who had not been part of the prank, summed up the event with a quotation: "WHY ARE YOU GUYS SO NOISY, AND WHY IS IT TWO A.M.?" (We answered that it was 2 AM because time flows linearly. Some later argued that time flows more like a parabola.)

A video of Blaise's reaction is available at http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1436169137130.

You can also find a series of photos taken in a stop-motion style at http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=30442&id=100000121159312&l=6d818727ba (by Noah Goldstein) or at http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2075472&id=1216741875 (by Theo Hong)

There remains one question, though. Why 599 cups?

It's simple; 600 would have been too many.

The hall (including RA Blaise) proceeded to make a few other uses of those same cups until the end of session, as detailed on the Hall page.

Astro Vs. Pbio

Vienna Harvey and Liz O'Neill took Paleobiology together in 2009. In 2010, they signed up for Astronomy together. This act led them to be declared traitors by Richard, the Pbio TA. After a few days of continued taunting and argument over which class was better, Richard challenged the Astronomy class to an Astro-Pbio Ultimate Frisbee game, which would continue until second Thursday. On this day, the winning class would have first choice of seats on the shared bus for both class field trips to the Smithsonian. Astro won, 6-2.

For a while after the field trip there was relative peace between the rival classes, although the Astro students were clamoring to play a prank on Pbio. Finally, Astro TA Lauren agreed. The Pbio classroom was invaded by binocular-weilding astronomers who wrote "THE ROMULANS ARE COMING!!!!" on the chalkboard, thoroughly confusing the Pbio kids, who were ignorant of such higher ideas. Richard challenged Lauren to a break-key match, and won, but everyone knows that was just a matter of luck, and no indication of Pbio's superiority (which is, of course, a ludicrous idea. As Vienna and Liz told Richard, in 2009 Pbio was better because Vienna and Liz were in it. In 2010, Astro was better, for the same reason).

Pbio retaliated by taping astrology charts to the door of the Astro classroom. Much to the annoyance of the students, Astro teacher Jason refused to let them play further pranks on Pbio. Instead, the Astro class resorted to ignoring Pbio's prank entirely--it was so bad it didn't even deserve recognition.

In 2011, at least two of the Astro girls plan to attend Pbio. Stay tuned...!

2011.1

DO THE MUFFIN...BOOM!

During the second Acting Improv of 2011.1, Yida Cai asked the sphinx a seemingly ordinary question: "O, great and mighty Sphinx...Do you know the Muffin Man?" The sphinx responded, "Do the muffin man." Because of the potential sexual interpretation of this answer, Alex Kohanski turned to Ajay Nadig and said "It's a dance!" Then, on a spot to the side of the Acting Improv circle, they proceeded to choreograph a simple, but beautiful dance.

Picture of Ajay and Kohanski doing the muffin for the first time

Within the next week, the muffin became a meme around the quad, making its way into numerous breakdance circles (Ajay and Kohanski pictured) and Acting Improv jokes. Kohanski and Ajay were astounded to find random people doing the dance they had created. The Muffin was performed to numerous songs, especially the Nyan Cat song. It is likely that a dance of such calibre will persevere throughout the ages.

Video of people doing The Muffin in Schnader Lounge

Breakfast Congratulations

One seemingly normal morning as CTYers walked in for breakfast a few people noticed an at first, small camp made up of a few Alcovians sitting in front of the main doors just outside of the arches. At first their intentions may have been unknown, but as people entered the dining hall applause followed. Soon more people began joining their humble, applauding camp and the group of CTYers expanded to continue their approval of fellow CTYers' choice of eating breakfast through applause. This continued, even towards a few campers attending the soccer camp (notorious for spelling), until one of the Lancastrian administrators disbanded the now bustling group of CTYers.

RACCOONS

"You could cut the sexual tension in this room with a knife". These were the words used by a CTYer to describe the Philosophy of Mind class in 2011.1. The girls in this class, along with some of the ladies in HDIS B were united under Jen, the hottest (female) RA on campus, in the hall that infamously became known as the Raccoons. Some offenses of these rowdy kids were walking around shirtless, taking group showers, and too much "boy talk" during hall meetings. Many Raccoons chose not to sleep at night, and instead talked through walls, or called their male friends in Schnader/Thomas. While this behavior was not okay with the SRAs, the Racoons used their good looks and seductive charm to get away with everything. They were best known for their classy and straight to the point chant, yelled whenever entering a formal event, of "Who are we? Raccoons! What do we want? Boys! When do we want them?! NOW!" Some other favorite raccoon activities included excessive PDA in the canoodle bushes, napping during class, and the stalking of a certain Joseph Curran. And occasionally Christian. And everyone else. Oh and making friendship bracelets.

Za or Pizza Time

The song Za, a staple of the 11.1 Session was actually first introduced in the 10.1 session by one, Paul Quigley, who had showed it to his Theo.B hall as a song that he made himself with a friend back home. It was kept mainly under wraps during 10.1, mostly only known to the Theo and Code.C halls who shared it with glee. However, during 11.1, the song was revived by Sam Fishman, a zombie nomore who had been in Quigley's Theo.B class the year before. Fishman spread it through the current Theo.B class to the Alcove, where it took on a new life and was celebrated every day at 6:09, known as "Pizza Time" by being sung by the entire Alcove. The song became so popular, that a petition was sought to try and get it played at the dance, though the song was completely NSFW, Fishman created a SFW version on his computer using intense music magic and played it for SRA John Moses, who then approved it for use at a dance. Unfortunately, it never was played at a dance, but was sung by Fishman and Rudy Garcia at an open-mic night held at one Quad Time session.

A link (NSFW) to the famous song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmeKVCuSnFQ

The Worst Story Ever Written

Having been imported by Mullin, the reading of the worst thing ever written. Trumping the previously Worst Story Ever Written, My Immortal, Metroid High School took the throne. Lacking a logical plot and simple grammar, it was concluded that this fan-fiction was created by the Worst-Author-Ever-To-Have-Existed or the Best-Literary-Troll-Ever-To-Have-Existed. The plot of a high school drama revolved around the characters of the game Metroid. The story was read throughout LAN.11.1 and an audiobook was found and replaced the reading. Here is a link to the first chapter.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2739850/1/Metroid_High_School

2011.2

The "Anonymous Box"

At the end of 2011.2, a number of campers made a prefabricated, person-sized tinfoil box with which to prank RA Jeff Sachs. On the last full day of the session, Jeff opened the door to his room to a small tinfoil room that was constructed out of tinfoil. He made his way through a small opening into a second tinfoil room, filled with paper hearts and plastic cups (a reference to the 599 cups prank). It took roughly eight hours to premake the tinfoil sheets, and about three hours to assemble. The prank name comes from the fact that, the day before, Jeff received a miniature version of the prank in the form of a small tinfoil box filled with paper hearts. Not knowing what to do with it, he taped it to the wall beside his door and called it the "Anonymous Box," unaware that the box he received would foreshadow the later prank.

Chesterqcarter

The man... the myth... the legend.

On July 17, an unassuming CTYer boarded the train to Lancaster. Unbeknownst to him, a fellow CTYer was in the same train, and noticed his many lanyards. Recognizing him from the previous year, she excitedly texted her friend, who, meaning to type "Is his name Chester or Carter?", typoed "Is his name Chesterqcarter?" instead. Thus, the CQC fanclub was born, and grew rapidly during LAN 11.2, comprised mainly of Pop Culture girls. His fans were especially excited whenever he was spotted with his top hat or pedo bear, which he most often had at the dances and Acting Improv, respectively. When he was spotted, his fans would shout "CHESTER-Q-F**KIN-CARTER!". A great time was had by all, and the fanclub continues to carry out its duties through the medium of Facebook. Chesterqcarter's given name is neither Chester nor Carter.

It is also worth noting that Chester Q. Carter has become a session 1 position as of 12.1.

2012.1

Theo A 12.1 Live From Stager

CATS!

iI love all of you <3

ipads are difficult to type on

i am supposedly organized...

bunnies

i love everyone <3

dont bark At visitors

everything changes when a man turns purple/orange.

I don't words.

1+9+8+1=13

always bark at couples making out

42

8191 is prime!

1729 is very interesting thanks

Ramanujan

The Little Theorem That Could!

because chairs are meh

Ghosts of the Quad

On CTY Halloween, during quad time, two mysterious figures in white ran out of Thomas hall and throughout the quad. At one point, they even danced at the dance show that was occurring at the moment. Their attempts to haunt the quad were repeatedly foiled by a (asian!) Ghostbuster who chased right back to where they came from. No ghost sightings have been reported since...

Ok, you wanna know the truth?

Kenjiro Lee decided it would be funny to prank the entire quad by dressing up as a Ghostbuster and chasing his two friends, David Hsu and Kevin Chen, around the quad. It proved really effective. And we got a good laugh because no one stopped us for running. Ok, maybe one guy tried to, but he figured out what we were doing and just laughed it off.

2012.2

Neil "Soggy Raj" Limaye

During the second dance of the session, there was a slow dance going on. Neil entered into a slow dance circle. Samantha Ngan, the future Muse, put her hand on his back and exclaimed that Neil was, in fact, very soggy. Neil, not offended by this remark, took over the title of Soggy. From that point onward, Neil was forever known as Soggy. That's how Neil inherited his first nickname. His second nickname came through two sources. The first source was from the current Jester, Noah Goldstein. Noah Goldstein always had to correct himself when addressing Neil because he always wanted to say "Hello Raj". Upon telling him about this, it was greatly complimented and told to Noah that he was the only one in the entire site who could call him Raj on a regular basis. The second source was from a couple of his friends including Gina Foley. During a weekend hangout in Schnader lounge, he asked them which Big Bang Theory character he was most like. They all replied with Raj. Soon, everyone was calling Neil Raj along with Soggy. Upon saying his final goodbyes to both his friends at CTY and CTY itself, many people said goodbye by saying "Stay Soggy, Raj."

Written by Neil. I love CTY and I love all of you guys so much.

Because Neil is awesome, his nickname is also written as "Sogieq".

During lunch one day in the Alcove...

"What's brown and sticky?"

Gina Foley: "[Neil] after a dance!"

Added to Neil's previously written work by Brianna Ford. Goddamn it, Neil!

I feel nauseous

During the stretch of time between dinner and study hall the evening of Second Sunday, a certain nomore girl named Jackie Liu felt particularly uneasy. This, however, did not stop her from socializing with her beloved friends, such as Venya Mayokovsky-Guschin. Venya, known for his rather intimate gestures of greetings, got in such close contact with Jackie that their bodies pressed together, and their faces were mere centimeters apart. His eyes bore lustfully into hers, but she couldn't help but to feel slightly sick. Perhaps it was due her unsettling hormones, or maybe it was a result of the amount of snacks from Turkey Hill she consumed during the preceding hall bonding. Although she adored Venya deeply, she said exactly as she felt: "I feel nauseous". Venya forwarded this gesture of intimacy with his fellow campers by greeting his friends with tender strokes on the cheeks and a hint of a kiss, soon followed by the same phrase, whispered sensually. Not long after, many a campers seemed to share a common sense of nausea while greeting each other.

The Gangly Gang

It all started with an awkward squirrel. This child (whose name is forever lost to the winds of time) asked Danny McClanahan where to find John Boysen. Danny being the quick-witted smartass he is, he answered "the gangly white kid who's not me or Venya," as Venya Mayakovsky-Gushchin walked up beside, resulting in great hilarity. This, after it was immediately communicated to JBoysee, became an inside joke on the scale of "also me," referred to many times throughout the session by campers of all ages. At one point (details are fuzzy (fuzieq <3) on this part), JBoysee had the brilliant observation that the group had become a sort of gang, which was denoted "the Gangly Gang." Danny then noted that this could totally be a 90s TV show. Since 90s TV shows always have ridiculous theme songs, a theme song was then improvised, which created a conga line of finger-snapping, from the dining hall all the way to the doors of North Ben. Neil being Neil, he intervened, and his charm and good looks quickly won over the Gangly Gang despite his overabundance of melanin and substandard height. From then on, the Gangly Gang referred to themselves as "the Gangly Gang (also Neil)." This continued until the final day, when Bryn Hammarberg, a onemore, was chosen as the successor to the Gangly Gang (fun fact: Bryn is the first member of the Gangly Gang without a distinctive hat), uniting gangly white kids to toe the line between awesome and facepalm-worthy. It is not known whether this shall continue for years to come.

Also Jonah

Saturdays where you need to Lancaster session 2. Like all sessions in Lancaster, they were filled with complete freedom, where the only obligation was going to the dance at 7:30 PM. During this time, a lot of the alcovians hung out in Schnader lounge. What they did there was something that no other session ever did. It was called couch time with Noah, Theo, and Jonah. It was like a radio show, but live and in person and in front of the audience. The thing about the show was that a lot of the times, Noah would be the one who was talking and most of his stories would be about his escapades with Theo. Jonah, feeling a little bit left out, would sometimes interject with "Also Me" to keep some of the direction that directed towards him. This became very popular throughout the campus, and people were saying "also me" in honor of him and to get their point in and to be included during multiple conversations. Even at the talent show, right after Noah Goldstein's performance, Jonah went up to the mic and said "also me". This became a very popular but also a very repetitive saying throughout the campus. This will forever be immortalized through the Internet.

Morty the Childsaur

A social experiment occured where Grace Kennedy and some others from her hall in South Ben (2A) placed a dinosaur with a baby head, who is and was affectionately called "Morty", around campus and watched what happened. Some people were rather violent, and did things like kicking and throwing the childsaur. Others showed their love for Morty by taking pictures/videos, praying to him, leaving him offerings, and even things like hugging and kissing the adored childsaur. Many people enjoyed seeing this friendly creature around campus. He was mentioned in many conversations and the occasional AI. Morty returned with Grace for her final two years of CTY, LAN 13.2 and LAN 14.2. We love you, Morty!!! <3. Morty returned yet again at lab 16.2, this time under the possession of camper Alex Burnside.

Tennis Campers Showdown

A rather interesting event took place during the Last Supper, but was not the Last Supper itself. Girls from the nearby tennis camps had joined CTYers for dinner, much to their dismay at CTY PDA. Most of them were in the KiVO line, where CTYers Derek Kim and Gustavo had engaged in conversation with said tennis campers, due to the conundrum of the KiVO line. One girl reportedly proclaimed that, "Touching others are gross!" and that "touching someone spreads sooo many germs!" Derek and Gustavo, ostensibly irritated, proceeded to shake hands, hug, and bump fists, much to the girl's disgust. After stating that even KISSING was somewhat sinful, Derek, (the beast he was) told the girl that "you obviously haven't had a significant other in your life before." The girl was clearly offended, and turned to her fellow campers, where she claimed that Tennis campers had more tradition, and chanted something along the lines of: "I feel so good, oh I feel so good, HUH!" By that time, many other CTYers had gathered around the commotion, where Derek, Gustavo, and Andrea Tsao started screaming afterdance chants, that were picked up by everyone around. The overall noise was so loud, that one inside his/her dorm claimed to hear it from the 3rd floor of North Ben.

After the incident was broken up by RAs, the participating campers then proceeded to join the Last Supper traditions that were taking place. While being outside for the Passing of the Duck, the Tennis campers passed by, chanting their "I feel so good" chant, among jeers and other derogatory comments, and responded with the CTY chant. CTYers faced these with the utmost dignity and pride in their nerdiness.

That is all.

- Derk, Stephano, Sted, Also known as: Derek

Fanhammer

The Fanhammer is a large hammer made from cardboard boxes wrapped neatly in grey duct tape, with a band of glow-in-the-dark duct tape wrapped around the base of the handle. It also has a duct-tape wrist loop at the end of the handle, which requires frequent repair. It is quite sturdy and is a viable weapon for bopping people with. The holder of the Fanhammer is a position usually given to a two-more, passed down very unofficially at some point near the end of the session. The hammer was created by the hall of Max Franklin during 12.2, and the hammer was given to him to hold the following year, bearing the name "Mjolnir". Since then it has been customary for the holder of the Fanhammer to re-dub it with a name of their own choice. The holder of the hammer should carry it around during the session and use it to affectionately whack other CTYers. Recent legend has it, that as of April 16, 2017, a co-fanhammer will be instated, who, according to a legend, may carry around a duct tape nail to compliment the spirit of the Fanhammer.

Hammer Holders:

• 12.2 Max Franklin, Chris Grossack, Theo Lipeles
• 13.2 Max Franklin
• 14.2 Milan Roberson
• 15.2 Sophia Hager
• 16.2 Annie Gleiberman (When Savannah Parrot could not return)
• 17.2 Jake Landsman (disputed/subject to rapid change come session)?

2013.1

Sherlock Reenactment

On several occasions during the first session, Milan Wolff stood on the Schnader Ledge in a complete Sherlock (of the television show) cosplay (unfortunately lacking Benedict Cumberbatch's voice), and reenacted Sherlock's scene on the hospital building at the end of Season Two. Often, an Alcovian would act as John, and they would complete the dialogue for the scene a few times. Due to an indestructible Nokia, Sherlock's act of throwing his phone dramatically aside could also be included. Due to shrubbery, The Fall could not truly be reenacted, which was lamentable indeed.

2013.2

House Cup

During the second session of 2013, the RAs decided to split the different halls into four different magical houses, as described in the legendary Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling. This prompted students to begin to make posters for their respective houses along with various large drawings adorned on open walls. For instance, the Ravenclaws of North Ben had a notable war with the Slytherins as they tried to outcompete each other with tape drawings of snakes and ravens. As for the actual competition, points were awarded to halls that were able to get to bed before lights out (Note: This feat was incredibly difficult to accomplish for obvious reasons, and thus points were rarely awarded for this reason), CTYers who displayed exemplary sportsmanship and kindness to their fellow CTYers, cleaning up plates in the dining rooms for friends, and other actions deemed points-worthy. Along with the competition, during the second week, the RAs planned a Harry Potter themed fair where campers had the chance to concoct potions with Snape (although these were not advised to be consumed, containing strange colorful liquids such as vinegar and baking soda that bubbled pleasantly when combined), create wands at Ollivander's, test their Harry Potter trivia knowledge, drink Butterbeer, and mass-marry their friends. The winners of the House Cup were announced at the Talent Show, along with the winners of various other competitions including the Ultimate Frisbee tournament, tennis tournament, Egyptian Rat Screw tournament, and soccer tournament. The campers who had attended all of the Fitness Bootcamp activity sessions were also given an award for their amazing dedication to physical fitness. Finally, much to the campers' surprise, the winning house was announced - Gryffindor! The announcement was greeted by much fanfare from the winning house, whose halls were subsequently awarded by being allowed to leave the Talent Show earlier than the other houses.

Edible Forks Return

Many older CTYers had been upset that the Kivo forks were no longer cornstarch-based, and thus no longer "edible." They now used a set of black plastic utensils that were not often recycled. (However, the black spoons were harder to mistake for the white spoons used in Blammo, which could have been a small advantage.) The CTY Admins and RAs designated a day to celebrate all birthdays occurring during the three weeks of CTY, and thus brought in an enormous vanilla and chocolate cake to be shared with all CTYers. And lo and behold, the edible biodegradable forks made a reappearance, prompting many young CTYers to attempt to consume the cornstarch utensils.

Television Crews' Arrival

The session was particularly special because a group of intellectually talented students from Greece arrived at camp for a part of the scholarship they received from CTY. The campers immediately assimilated themselves among the other CTYers, many becoming popular with the campers especially because their arrival prompted television crews to come in and videotape certain classes.

2014.1

Unpause

The Unpause was a "family-friendly neighborhood language cult" formed the first Saturday of 14.1 by Katrina Howard, Sophie Feldman, Nico Vallone, and Matisse Peppet. Nico started calling Katrina "Qatarina" (like the country) to annoy her; some conversation and a grammar mistake later, a list of rules had been created and passersby were being asked to introduce themselves. The rules were dubbed "The Unpause Clause" and are as follows:

1. No plural

2. All name country

3. May or may not article

4. No tense

5. Occasional Spanish

6. No French...EVER

7. Qatarina have 7 oil

8. All hail 8 spade

9. qaTARina

10. 10 rule

By dinner, more than thirty people (including multiple staff members) were circled up outside of South Ben, chanting the rules. New people would be pulled in with shouts of "Introduce!" and "Name?"; their name would then be turned into a play on the name of a country (e.g. "Lily" might become "Lilthuania"); each person would introduce themself by their country name; the rules would be stated; if the person desired clarification of any rules, the rules would be explained; and then the Death Pop Quiz ("Death if and only if fail. No wish fail; therefore many generous hint if necessary.") would take place. The quiz consisted of the new cult member stating a specific rule. The explanations of rules generally followed the same pattern:

1. No plural: all noun singular

2. All name country: have country, like Qatar; mesh with name. Country name only name in Unpause--may not use pause name

3. May or may not article: Unpause have free speech, so give choice. "A," "an," and "the" may be use or be omit, according to desire. All part speech (like preposition, conjunction, pronoun) may omit as well.

4. No tense: verb not have tense. Use shorten infinitive. Example: Nicoragua be not good at use rule four. Use "be" since infinitive be "to be."

5. Occasional Spanish: self-explanatory.

6. No French...EVER: nothing against France or French culture, food, or people. Not even dislike language. Just use of French language prohibited.

7. Qatarina have 7 oil: Qatarina come from Qatar. Qatar in Middle East, have much oil--7 oil. Nicoragua have 3 oil. Maltese have half oil. Sophinland have .7 oil. Amount oil roughly depend real world, geography. No one have more than 7 oil. 

8. All hail 8 spade: *hold up 8 spade card* 8 spade be deity. 

9. qaTARina: on pronunciation of Qatarina's name. Pronounce country name override pronounce pause name

10. 10 rule: there be 10 rule. 

A few other notes: 

• The day Unpause was born, Matisse had drawn the seams and buttons onto Nico's flower pot, which he had painted blue and pink in a manner that resembled a polo shirt. It is a matter of debate within the founding members whether in the end Matisse or Nico did more work on the flower pot. The polo flower pot became the home of the 8 Spade card. At one point during a slightly homoerotic dorm room scuffle between Nico and his roommate Brady, the pot cracked. In a display of immense skill one breakfast time, Katrina used bright orange duct tape Matisse had lying around to keep it together.

• All members have an oil count. Everyone (except Qatarina) has less than seven oil. Some people have negative oil. Each person makes up their own amount of oil, roughly based on their country. 

• Rule 7 is based about the 7 oil qatarina have. These 7 oil be olive, peanut, baby, peppermint, lemon, extra virgin olive, and bath. Somewhat purposely leaving out actual oil.

• Rule 8 came into existence because it was decided that the cult needed an object to worship, so the four founders brainstormed. Matisse happened to have an eight of spades that had been used as a straightedge for the drawing of a seam on the polo flower pot. Since it was a ruler, it only seemed fitting to declare it a deity.

• Rule 10 was suggested by David May (country name Dåland, but usually called Davemark to annoy him) when the four founders were looking for a tenth rule to round out the number of rules they had.

Unpause meetings were held daily before morning class. The Unpause doctrine grew more sophisticated, like cavemen doing the first crude cave drawings. A list of clarifications, written on the second Sunday without regards to any grammar, is as follows: 

• allowed to remove any words so long as the gist of the meaning is able to be understood

• no disruptive unpauses

• allowed to use any language so long as it is not French and is occasionally Spanish

• French words adopted into English are neither condoned nor condemned

• if a noun is always plural, use a synonym

• if a word is both singular and plural, add "ie" to the end (e.g. one deerie, two deerie) 

• dueling protocol: if one does not accept apology or gets into other trouble, one may request a duel. Both people play ninja, frisbee (every time successful throw, one step back), thumb war, or 10 pace pistol. If cannot agree-- 10 pace pistol. Death = intense humiliation from everyone present.

• after introduce-> polite clapping

• all 8 spade hailworthy

• country pronounce overrule name pronounce

Saying "unpause" (or being in "the unpause") means one is then required to speak according to the Unpause Clause; conversely "pause" temporarily halts the speaking of the language. Sometimes, after the world had recently been paused, Unpause language would bleed into the pause. This phenomenon was dubbed "Midpause" and could be quite awkward if those being talked to were unaware of Unpause. However, not many people escaped the clutches of Unpause entirely, probably due to the fact that a group of thirty people chanting in unison isn't exactly hard to miss. Several cult jokes were made in Acting Improv and "All hail 8 buzzsaw" (in reference to the glowstringing move) became a joke among a group of people who were not members. On the second Wednesday, it was decided that an 8 Spade hymn was needed, and, after deciding against parodying the Gloria Patri, the Ode to 8 Spade was born. Sung to the tune of "O Christmas Tree," the lyrics are as follows:

All hail 8 Spade

All hail 8 Spade

Giver of language rule

All hail 8 Spade 

All hail 8 Spade

(The) passive seer of our world

The membership of Unpause ranked in the fifties or sixties by the end of the session. Many members were squirrels, though the cult drew in returners as well. Some people were frightened of Unpause and chose to not join; however, many of these people ended up learning the rules nonetheless. 

There was some talk of creating an Afterdance chant for The Unpause, but sadly, this was not possible due to things.

On Second Saturday, the carnival was themed International and there was an activity for CTYers to paint their own flags. Sophie and Katrina decided to make an 8 Spade flag in the ten minutes before an Unpause meeting was due to begin. On a section of red butcher paper, an eight of spades design was hastily painted. The flag was very beautiful. After the meeting that day,  it was taped to North Ben, outside Nico's third-floor window. The flag was taken down later that day after a no-knock raid by the administration but was glorious while it lasted. For some reason, the SRA refused to believe that Nico did not, in fact, open his window (and thus violate window-opening rule) but rather scaled the building to hang the flag. The SRA failed to recognize that in order to take the flag down, the window would have to be opened.

Unpause faced religious persecution once, during an afternoon meeting on Second Saturday. A girl with an aluminum foil scythe came over to the meeting and mimed murdering half of the circle while a story about eggplants was being told. Politely enduring this genocide, Unpause turned the other cheek until the girl was satisfied with her rampage and skipped away. The remaining members then tuned back into the riveting narrative being told by Brodeman Empire (Brady Itkin).

Also on Second Saturday, it was learned that Samanada had received a new, fluffy puppy named Tater. The girl's iPhone was passed around the circle so that everyone might see a picture of the newly named Taterland (like Ireland; fitting because of the potato association). It was decided that Taterland was the mascot of 8 spade as well as the president of Nepal (where no potatoes grow). A duel that day consisted of the Bradaman Empire (Brady Itkin) and Nicoragua (Nico Vallone) filibustering on the topic of Taterland as the president of Nepal. The one who talked longest without messing up a rule of The Unpause Clause won. Nicoragua lost the duel.

Nicoragua, despite being a founding member and generally very bad at the grammar, tended to infringe upon the rules very often, which led to many duels. In fact, he was a part of every duel held in Unpause that session . . . and lost every duel. After losing each duel, he 'died': accepting humiliation from each member of the Unpause present one at a time in a hilariously inefficient process.

On the last Tuesday of the session, the daily meeting was moved to 6:20 PM. Instead of trying to draw in new members, the meeting was focused on rehashing the past. Members were introduced, as were the rules, but then people read the clarifications and sang Ode to 8 Spade. Finally, the four founding members told the story of Unpause from the beginning. When they reached the end of the story, they intended to end Unpause forever.

However, they were shocked as members began inquiring about the future and there was a movement to continue it in 15.1. In the words of Nicoragua: 'Had no idea that people actually gave shit about Unpause.' To which members replied: 'shit given.' In the few minutes before class began, people interested in doing unpause in 15.1 came forward. No one person was chosen to carry Unpause on; instead, the interested persons formed a council. However, this list was lost and the council did not happen, so instead, Unpause was carried on in 15.1 by Qatarina.

Unpause carried through during 15.1, when Qatarina held the 8spade and poll flower pot. After the session it was decided by 16.1 nomores to introduce the Unpause rules as an Afterdance chant. Qatarina, who was still in possession, passed the 8spade and polo flower pot down to Victanzania at MIT Splash! 2015, and created the position of Unpause Priest(ess). It be hope that Unpause continue for many century.

Unpause carried variable emotional associations. For some, it was a joke; for others, a way of feeling a part of a community; still others felt it was a method for meeting new people; and some even found they cared about Unpause, the stories, and the memories. All hail 8 spade!

Unpause Priest(ess)

The Unpause Priest(ess) is the person (or people) who holds the polo flower pot and the original holy 8spade of your favorite family-friendly neighborhood language cult, Unpause. The Unpause was started in 14.1 by Matisse Peppet, Katrina Howard, Nico Vallone, and Sophie Feldman during the first Saturday carnival, and grew in strength and members throughout the session. During 15.1, Katrina was the only remaining creator who returned. The Unpause kept a low profile, but the spirit remained, and the 16.1 nomores promised to revitalize the cult for the next year as an Afterdance chant. The Priest is responsible for keeping the cult alive and dangerous and beautiful, as it should be. It should be noted that the Priest should not exactly be treated as a position in the traditional sense (for instance, it has never been passed at Passionfruit but rather at an informal ceremony). Rather, one should view the Priest as a democratic leader within the Unpause only (which is clearly the entire world, anyway).

Priests:

• 14.1: Matisse Peppet, Katrina Howard, Nico Vallone, and Sophie Feldman
  
• 15.1: Katrina Howard
  
• 16.1: Victoria Provost

The Sung-Through American Pie

The legendary Laundry Run of 13.1 left an outstanding legacy. The night before the last dance of 14.1, there came a knocking at the doors: an ISO check. Realizing the danger, an emergency text send-out to quite a few people prevented a huge ISO bust, but two nomores were caught. As a result, they were banned from attending the last dance, much to everyone's anger. To make up for them missing their last "American Pie," shortly after the Afterdance a group of students led by John Boland formed a circle, threw the two nomores into it, and began belting out "American Pie." Those left on the quad after the Afterdance (almost everyone, actually) soon joined in and the entire thing was performed. It was an emotional moment.

The ISO check caused some confusion: no one is sure what prompted it, unlike last year where a parent calling the police after not hearing from their child caused the huge bust. The best explanation one can give is it was a result of last year's bust. Their were plans to change the CTY chant to this:

CTY HAS NICE QUADS
CTY WE LOVE YOU
ADMIN IMPOSED
ADMIN IMPOSED
CTY WHAT HAPPENED?

But then Radhika accidentally shouted "Do your laundry!" and that was the end of that.

The Dave

The Dave is a session two position created in session 1 of 2014 by David May, who is the eternal session 1 The Dave. It began as a gimmick, because whenever Dave would introduce himself, he would say "Hi, I'm Dave," resulting in someone else chiming in, "He's Dave," and someone else "Yeah he's Dave," "It's the Dave," etc. The Dave, as is written in the The Dave notebook, is given to a person who is best at being themselves, doing whatever they want to do, knowing when it is appropriate to break or bend the rules, who can make a fool of themselves any time of the day through awkwardness, clinical insanity, the need to dance to any song by flailing about, and air-guitaring vigorously to the second half of Stairway to Heaven. Essentially, The Dave is given to whatever onemore has best embodied the OD and the example he set during his time at session 2. The Dave, besides being a position of flaunting your vibrant personality, has a digital watch that is passed down to be worn on lanyards, akin to how the style in which the OD wore it, and a The Dave notebook serving as the doctrine for The Dave's sacred order and detailing the specifics and duties of The Dave, along with the prophecy held sacred to all The Dave's.

During Lancaster 14.2, Diana Halikias had the honor of being the first non-OD Dave. The entire site quickly learned of this important position, and witnessed an iconic passing-down during 14.2 Passionfruit. Diana first passed The Dave to her fellow nomore Matias "Mavs" Gonzalez, who then returned it to the OD. The OD finally passed it to Drew Hill. The Dave is a position that is passed down with flair each year; in the case of 14.2, it involved Matias as an honorary Dave.

Daves:

• 14.1: David May
  
• 14.2: Diana Halikias
  
• 14.2.1: Matias "Mavs" Gonzalez
  
• 14.2.2: David May
  
• 15.2: Drew Hill
  

David May is the eternal session 1 Dave

The Dave is passed down to a nomore at Passionfruit before being passed to a young onemore PreDave via mating ritual.

2014.2

TOPI-B Wild

14.2, TOPI-B was a wild class, taught by Brent Krammes with the legendary TA Ruth A. Book (Original Form). The warriors of this class included: John Issac Boland (JIB), Louis Herman (master analyzer of V for Vendetta), Claire Borecki, Angelique Fenton (Mama Fenton), Drew Hill (dsmallmountain), Thomas Godwin (T-GOD), Hannah Hildebolt (hanlax), Annabelle Hutchinson, Andrew Javens (preppy tourist), Mona Lee (mona sa lee), Christian Lillie, Grace Nie (the cute pie), Ellie Taylor, Allison Tielking (tielqueen), and Andrea Tsao. Before this class, all these people were strangers. None of them knew each other at all. From the second night of camp, TOPI-B wild.

Both halls were the stuff of legends. In the TOPI-B guys' hall, was the Suite. The Suite consisted of Louis Herman, Andrew Javens, Christian Lillie, and John Boland. This was the most attractive suite in history. One night, three members gathered to watch Cow Belles, a Disney original movie starring Aly and Aj. While the other three were watching the movie, the fourth talked to his lesbian S.O. over Skype. A fight club was never ever ever even considered. Not even once. Two students didn't decide to start a bare-knuckles Brad Pitt and Edward Norton style ring. It definitely did not end after one night. It didn't exist, so it totally wasn't the most pathetic fight club in history. Nobody got a black eye. What are you even talking about?

The TOPI-B girls' hall was, if at all possible, even gayer and wilder. However, due to all the girls being such rule-abiding students, and despite many members of the hall being bisexual (and the rest being pretty heteroflexible), nobody hooked up. Ever. They didn't. Shut up. Several of the girls were eventually barred from the last dance because they were caught having one of their many ISOs (and possibly an incident involving tea leaves).

TOPI-B discovered that birthmarks don't have to be on your body from birth, and don't have to last more than a few hours (or a few days in the case of the more enthusiastic students), especially those on the neck.

(REWRITE OF TOPI-B 2K14 MATERIAL IN PROGRESS)

2015.1

The Whip

A seemingly harmless dance of the CTY-I Nasty Freestyle by Megan Howard and Catalina Ruiz-Jimenez turned into the dance of the session. They proceeded to do it whenever and wherever to the annoyance of Gene and hardcore CTYers. Megan, who played Columbia in Rocky Horror, did the Whip during the words "He had a pickup truck", which resulted in loud cheers and groans from the crowd.

Gene the Gnome

The Jester, Gene, was a abnormally short man under 5' 6" whose life was turned upside down by Yik Yak. His height was a constant topic of AI and meal time. He was known as a gnome for most of the session which sparked many ideas such as asking the Great Sphinx why he was short, working at a gnome factory during Late to Work, and more.

This was the feed of Yik Yak at one time:

• GENE THE BEAN DIDN'T GET WATERED ENOUGH AS A SEEDLING
• GENEALINA only exists in Gene's dream
  • Genealina was a common ship between Gene and Catalina, a hot One Hit Wonder
• Genetics 101: A Gene at gene will stay at gene unless acted upon by a greater and/or stronger GENE
• Heard on campus: "What did Gene (allegedly) do now?"
• Gene is a bean to the extreme
• Gene is a gentleman and a scholar
• Gene does not have a nice butt
• Get "GENE" off of Yik Yak. We don't need no CTY middle school
• Gene.........is ok?
• Gene is special
• Gene is ok I guess
• Gene's face looks unfinished
• Gene does the CTY challenge
• The weather is awful because of Gene
• Gene jacks off in the shower

CTY IS LIKE A SECOND HOME, WE EVEN HAVE A GARDEN GNOME

Giant Grass Orgy

One day after dinner during the second week of the session, one-more Ciara Donegan mentioned to Kristin Donegan that she had yet to be in a grass orgy, as her class was almost entirely made up of squirrels and flying squirrels. With the help of other friends, they then went on to call people over and have a grass orgy. Many people attempted to count how many people were there, and although the exact number is not known, approximately 76 people are thought to have participated in what was certainly the largest grass orgy that session, and possibly one of the largest ones to ever happen since the grass orgy of first dance Stairway 14.1.

Shots

During a game of Truth or Dare among COGN-A 13.1 students, Ciara Donegan dared Andrew Moore and a few other classmates to drink bubble mix, not expecting anyone to actually do it. However, they did, and they repeated the stupidity every year following during the Thanksgiving Feast, a tradition started by Kristin Donegan in 14.1. In 15.1, Andrew bought shot glasses from the bookstore, so at the Thanksgiving Feast, he and other CTYers took shots of bubble mix. At Passionfruit, the shotglasses were used to take shots of SKL. Andrew, at the suggestion of the Trinity, then passed them to onemore Victoria Provost, officializing the item.

The shot glass holders have a reputation for being slightly off their rockers.

During 15.2, the stunt was repeated (carrying the tradition to session 2) along with the Thanksgiving feast by Andrew and other double-sessioners. Unexpectedly, large amounts of people decided to try a shot and the feast got rather out of hand. This caught the negative attention of DRL Will. At Passionfruit 15.2, the RAs attempted to suppress the passing of the position by preventing Andrew from speaking, but the item was passed down to Apurva afterwards anyway to Apurva Memani. However, the tradition did not continue at 16.2. The holder of the shot glasses, in addition to taking shots, organizes the Thanksgiving feast.

At 16.1, Victoria led the CTYers in taking shots of a mixture of watermelon, watermelon juice, SKL, and cream soda. When a student suggested that the supreme watermelon overlord who sacrifices Carol should be a position, it was decided that the annual sacrifice of Carol the Watermelon should be forever continued. Rather than create a new position, the two current ringleaders of Carol and Thanksgiving decided to merge their duties and add the killing of Carol to the responsibilities of Shots in the future.

After the fiasco at 15.2, admin declared that the ingestion of bubble mix was strictly forbidden. Shprinkles was reminded of this at the start of 16.1 with a stern warning. In light of the situation, the Thanksgiving Feast-goers took shots of lemon juice (as it was deemed to be similarly awful), SKL, and different combinations of the two. Admin was fine with this, and this substitute is expected to continue at LAN.1.

Session 1:

• 15.1: Andrew Moore
• 16.1: Victoria "Shprinkles" Provost
• 17.1: Will McClelland

Session 2:

• 15.2: Andrew "Chad" Moore
• 16.2: Apurva Memani

The Savage

The Savage, created by nomore Tekettay Ludvig at LAN 15.1, is a loosely defined position meant to be the "anti-jester". They hype up rap battles, attack people with the Savage pool noodle (an artifact of the position, christened with SKL), and generally try to get people psyched and do savage things. Though the position may seem petty/insignificant, the role of the Savage is supposed to represent courage, individuality and the willingness to stand up to the system. The position was created/declared by Tekettay at the Last Supper, and later passed to maybe-onemore Alex "Chinchilla" Waclawski at passionfruit. While the validity of this position may be in question due to significant opposition, its creation was approved by several of the current position holders. However, at a later date, Alex Waclawski was removed from this position. Tekettay then passed the position of Savage to Trinity Duffield-Pugsley, who had been declared 'the female savage' at 15.1. Trinity Duffield-Pugsley was then unable to attend 16.1, so she passed it onto her best-friend and equally savage partner in crime, Diane Hwangpo.

(Note: As noted above, there is no official process for the creation of a new position. It is valid if and only if it remains a "thing").

Savages:

• 15.1: Tekettay Ludvig
• 16.1: Trinity Duffield-Pugsley/Diane Hwangpo
• 17.1: Andrew Budge

2015.2

BMF War

The tension between the Blue Mountain Festival summer camp and CTY came to be known as the BMF War. College students attending Franklin & Marshall in the summer also caught onto this war, however the majority of the battles were in between BMF and CTY. This tension was displayed primarily on Yik Yak. Many Yaks changed the BMF abbreviation in order to make fun of the camp, including "bmf: bacon mettuce fomato" and "BMF= Buffalos Must Fuck". The BMF students and college kids grew frustrated at CTY campers constantly blocking the walkways and ended up putting out all their frustrations onto Yik Yak. Some Yaks nearly became threats, in which someone (most probably an RA) replied "Touch my kids and I'll fuck you up", which was greeted with much enthusiasm. At one point, the war nearly came to life when a CTYer Yakked, inviting any BMF camper to fight in front of the Arches at 7:00 PM. The fight never happened, as at that time, study hall at already begun. This camp war goes down as the first camp rivalry to ever have occurred in the history of LAN.

Easy Mac

An abnormal amount of fire alarms occurred that session. Although not all alarms were thanks to the burning of Easy Mac, it came to be known at AI and site-wide that Easy Mac was the primary reason for all the alarms. The first alarm was not because of Easy Mac. At Weis, someone pulled the fire alarm for an unknown reason the night before the actual fire alarm drill (Apparently, it was an accident). The second alarm after the drill was in Schnader after light's out when Helen Zhang forgot to put water in her Easy Mac and the whole dorm was evacuated. Yelling and screaming from the quad could be heard in other dorms. The third alarm was late in the afternoon on Second Saturday. Schnader, again, was the affected dorm. An unknown person burned popcorn and set off the alarms, sending all CTYers in Schnader outside.

While outside a number of halls began to sing fire related songs until an SRA told us all to "Please stop, some people can sleep right now and will be very mad at you later if you don't let them" after this parodies of fire related songs started to crop up across the quad at a lower volume. Notably Sanna's hall composed CTY Yankee Doodle as follows:

Yankee Doodle went to town

riding on a pony

put no water in the bowl

and burned the macaroni

Yankee Doodle effed it up (this line was originally sung in anger at 11:27 pm with the actual F word, and was also repeated to adults with "messed it up" instead. All 3 ways are acceptable.)

keep the water handy

Yankee Doodle effed it up

Next time just eat candy (sometimes sung as "with a glass of Brandy" to imply that only drunk people could mess up easy mac, but this is CTY-I and also doesn't make as much sense.)

after the popcorn fire drill a second verse was composed. Helen Zhang herself walked past this, and asked for the entire thing to be sung again so she could get a recording of it.

Yankee Doodle went to town

riding on a pony

burnt the popcorn in the bag

just like the macaroni

Yankee Doodle effed it up

keep the water handy

Yankee Doodle effed it up

Next time just eat candy

Netflix and Chill

During one particularly memorable game of Freeze at Acting Improv, Ashley Wells received an opportunity to make a joke that would be remembered for centuries. She entered the compromising position set up by the previous scenario's actors, looked up at her partner, and said, "But I thought you said Netflix and chill!" This joke was greeted by enormous applause and laughter and would be repeated in several different AIs, in the Facebook group, and on Yik Yak. This being one of the most notable quotes of the session, Sam Mauro proceeded to pass on the Quotebook position to Ashley Wells.

KIVO American Pie

The last Monday of 15.2, during lunch, there was (as usual) a large crowd gathered in the KIVO section of the dining hall. The radio station playing in the dining hall usually plays songs that your parents would have thought were very cool, and hip, and mostly go ignored by students. However, that fateful Monday, a song known and beloved by all at CTY came on - American Pie. Slowly at first, but quickly gaining traction, CTYers began to sing, and by the first chorus, at least 50-60 CTYers in KIVO, both in line and sitting at tables, were singing along. During the first chorus, almost everyone sang all of the callbacks (complete with a shout of "no orgies" from the Jester, Isaiah Cole and other responsible nomores), but the more explicit words were replaced by "Shh" and "KIVO" shouted instead of "ORGY" during the subsequent verses. (NO KIVO was shouted in confusion at least once per verse) Not only did a large crowd sing around, the lyrics were acted out, with Hannah Hildebolt as Jack Flash, Isaiah Cole as (obviously) the Jester, Dan Rabinovich as Satan, Lucy Danger as the Sacrificial Rite, Patrick Yee and AR Ciccariello as king and queen respectively, and even a marching band and football team. Any object on hand was used for props, including a rainbow duct tape roll to stand in for Fire, and a baseball hat as the thorny crown. By the end, a circle had formed, and linked together to kick along (with the right foot first, of course) to the final chorus. Everyone who was in attendance generally agreed that it was one of the coolest things that had ever happened to them while waiting in line for a quesadilla, and definitely worth losing your previous place in line over.

Anna Sun

This song was first played at the last quadtime of 14.2, and it was very emotionally compromising for the nomores. At 15.2, it was played at nearly every single dance. Students would congregate in the center in a "Mr. Brightside" way, but instead of grabbing a staff, they all held hands in the middle. It was very emotional and CTY-y. It is the intention of many to make it both session one and session two canon, as it is unofficially canon for session 2 already and was treated as such.

Ball Stuck in the Tree

The tree near the center of Hartman Green was notorious this session for getting all sorts of things stuck in it. From Frisbee to sticks to water bottles to foursquare balls, the tree devoured any athletic equipment that was thrown at it. This resulted in large portions of every class break time being spent not playing ball sports, but attempting to retrieve the ball. Eventually, a member of the NEURO class got a green foursquare ball was stuck so well that no matter what was chucked at it, it wouldn't budge. After a few days of relentless struggle, (which attracted quite a crowd at each break) the CTYers below had given up all hope. However, mysteriously, the ball appeared one morning at the base of the tree covered in various duct tape with the message "To Neuro, With Love" from Satan (with Satan crossed out and Santa written underneath). This ball was subsequently deemed the class item of NEURO and was taken home by Via Barr to pass to the following year's class.

Pride Parade

The session of 15.2 is the first session on record to have a pride parade. The parade, the brainchild of nomore Ele Grant, was a revitalization of the old Love Tape day ideas that centered around LGBT+ awareness. In an effort to bring back the awareness and to host a pride parade for those closeted at home or missing out on other pride parades, the parade was birthed. It was planned by Ele, Rosemary Wonnell, Hannah Hildebolt, and Lucy Danger, who headed an activity called "Pride Parade planning" to make duct tape flags for participants to carry around. The actual parade was held between dinner time and study hall on Love Tape day. It garnered around 50 campers, who marched around the quad holding their flags, blowing bubbles, and shouting four chants: "CTY has a gay butt, CTY we love you, forevermore, forevermore, CTY we love you," "She's beauty, she's grace, she's really really ace," "G is for gender, that's good enough for me, G is for gender, that's good enough for me, G is for gender, that's good enough for me, oh gender gender sexuality!," and lastly, "Things are so gay, but they could be gayer!" Two of chants are variants of afterdance chants, one chant is a pop culture reference, and one is a play on an activity that had happened that week. The parade only lasted ten minutes or so, but was hugely successful. The nomores of 16.2 plan to repeat the parade the next year, and to hopefully keep it going.

2016.1

SKL Easy Mac

During the third week of camp, Oliver "Brick" Reinhardt was quoted saying, "has anyone ever made SKL with easy mac?" Naturally, he decided to test the inverse of this inquiry (that is, easy mac with SKL), and with the help of Drew Genuit he brought to life his vision during lunch on third Tuesday. The easy mac was left on a table in KIVO and all were invited to try. Upon taking a bite, the easy mac was discovered to be a mix of cheesy and sugary, and it was generally accepted to be frankly quite disgusting.

Scalene Triangles

As CTY sessions go, there is always at least one meme that defines a large amount of jokes made in those three weeks. For this session, it was the scalene triangle who took prevalence over all other contenders. The staff would look away in shame as campers would continually make sex noises that seemed to come from the actions of a certain trigonometric element, though it became harder to ignore as their voices steadily got louder and more erotic (driving many an asexual camper away from the alcove for a time). The scalene triangle was recited all over campus throughout the three weeks and never lost its glory and luster, despite the increasingly disturbed groans that came from many who had heard it a time too many.

Camping on the Quad

On the morning of the second Sunday, campers who went to breakfast were greeted by an unfamiliar sight- a bright green tent set up on the quad. Those who bothered to look inside found that there were six people inside the tent, wearing pajamas, surrounded by sleeping bags, pillows, and blankets, and eating food pirated from the dining hall. Ariel Uy, Victoria Provost, Sophia Hager, Kristin Donegan, Ciara Donegan, and Lily Dondoshansky would only explain that the tent belonged to the Collective. A very tired-looking Deb the RA (who may or may not have made a deal with admins to not have check-out duty for the rest of session) was supervising the tent (and may have left for a few minutes to catch pokemon). It is unclear as to how long the nomores spent in the tent.

Pokemon Go

The release for Pokemon go happened to be during first session. Thereafter, for the rest of session, campers (and sometimes RAs) would often be seen wandering around campus attempting to locate elusive pokemon. These players often formed marauding bands working together for a common goal, since once the location of a pokemon was found, others would flock to the spot in the hopes of also obtaining it. This single-minded determination became the subject of a few AI jokes, and also created by necessity a hall announcement that ran somewhere along the lines of "Pokemon Go is fun! Please don't leave the areas you're supposed to be in to get new pokemon though." A Pokemon Go activity was formed, and numerous halls' bonding activities consisted of looking for new pokemon. The madness went so far that some campers actually started playing Pokemon Go when the Pokemon Theme played at the last dance.

Pride Parade

Inspired by the work by Ele Grant and Rosemary Wonnell, CTYers Will and Annie decided to bring a pride parade to session 1. A rained-out planning activity caused an impromptu poster making session to be held in Schnader lounge on second Saturday and another one outside Thomas on Sunday. A lacrosse stick (that had only been in use for two hours ever) was decorated by Annie with rainbow duct tape on the stick and an assortment on duct tape at the top, and given to Will to lead the parade with. The parade was a success with chants being borrowed from the 15.2 parade including a new one "If you're gay and you know it [clap your hands, stomp your feet, shout out loud]". At the end of the parade the staff was passed down to twomore (later learned to be a 17.1 nevermore) Grace Finlayson to continue the tradition next year.

2016.2

The Bee Movie

After a game of Half-Life in AI required the actors to act out the plot of the bee movie went terribly wrong (none of the actors had seen the movie), a slight obsession of The Bee Movie was spawned. A later game of Half-Life ("escaping from quarantine") devolved into a student twerking while reading bee movie fanfiction, to the delight of all onlookers.

Spicy Big Dads

Nomores Rosemary Wonnell and Caroline Shea bought matching shirts for twin day that had the words "SPICY BIG DAD" written on them. These shirts brought them much attention and quickly became a meme.

Linguistics vs. Logic-b

A feud rooted in sidewalk illustrations. The classes would often shout out "LOGIC B!" and "LINGUISTICS!" during the afterdance, and would feign dislike for each other.

Watch Asher Flail

One activity involved watching RA Asher play Just Dance 4. It was incredible.

Formation

An activity to learn Beyonce's choreography to Formation turned into so much more when it was performed at the second Saturday dance. Lots of cheering and screaming "EMMA JOHNSTON I LOVE YOU!!!" ensued.

The Satan Are You Crying Club

This session, a group of campers from various courses (there were always students from Paleobiology and Astrophysics) gathered in the KIVO Alcove to read aloud horrible fanfiction, including "She wants the B," "Donkey, please," and, most prominently, "My Immortal." They would sit at what was known as the Gayble (gay + table), a long rectangular table, and pass around one camper's phone to read aloud a horrible fanfiction, which was almost always "My Immortal." They called themselves the Satan Are You Crying Club in reference to "My Immortal."

The Last Dance

During the last dance, RA Viv played Sweatshirt by Jacob Sartorius, which quickly evolved into a rick roll. However, that rick roll turned into the John Cena theme song to the delight and surprise of the campers. The last dance also featured another performance of Formation, and of course, Anna Sun.

Canon Additions

16.2 had a camp-wide canon vote to introduce new songs and consolidate old songs into canon. Anna Sun by Walk the Moon was voted into canon, as was Iris and Always.

Communism

Casey Waite.

2017.1

Admin

With the arrival of a new site director from JHU, Lancaster 17.1 faced the challenge of dealing with incompetent admin. Nomores found themselves submitting lists of activities after the RAs lost the old one (Bad Acting Appreciation was entirely omitted from the session, much to everyone's disappointment), writing two four-page drafts of the rules of blammo after it was banned from Lancaster, and fixing canon when the wrong versions of songs were played (i.e. Oh L'Amour). The admin situation put something of a damper on the session for a lot of nomores, but they refused to go down without a fight, and in the end, everything turned out okay.

2 Gods, No Masters

Admin tried to ban blammo because they always like to forget that LAN is not JHU. We didn't let them. Two meetings with admin and two four-page drafts of rules written by .1 gods Sienna Axe and Aidan Parker (with help from the .2 god, Michael Zhang) later, blammo began on second Thursday instead of the usual first Wednesday.

Let It Snow

The Advanced Fiction class at LAN 17.1 happened to host jester Casey Waite. Much to the delight of literally everyone at camp, he showed his classmates a link to a hella zesty version of Let It Snow that he helped produce. The song became a well-known and beloved anthem, and with the help of onemores Nathan Burke and Josh Hejna, Father Will McClelland created a sick mix that lead from Let It Snow into Darude's Sandstorm, which was then used for the rave circle at the Second Saturday dance. The original song can be found here: https://m.soundcloud.com/couples-counseling/let-it-snow.

Below 16

RA Laurence's purity score.

3 Kazoo's

Camper Elizabeth Hawk became a legend one day during lunch. she was asked how many kazoo's she could fit in her mouth and she responded"I have three lets fine out" and proceeded to put all 3 in her mouth and then play them. while they were in her mouth she screamed "this is my greatest life achievement" and "I am a god amongst you peasants".

Beezed Out

Getting "beezed out" was a popular experience among students that constitutes putting burt's bees chapstick on your eyelids. It lead to frequent AI jokes, a lot of pain amongst students with weaker eyelids, and also to RA Asher stating "there is no more use for coffee, I'll just put some of this stuff on and I'll be awake". It was wild, would recommend 100% if you enjoy masochism and bees.

Old Spice?

Jack Flash Emily Haase brought Old Spice to camp and proceeded to walk around and whip it out of her pocket asking "old spice?". Old Spice was then brutally murdered by jester Casey Waite during an acting improv where Emily was being slightly loud, which lead to louder indignation and the accumulation of another Old Spice by the end of the week.

The Summoning of Nathan Burke

One day during session, Son Mia Hotsuki was wondering where onemore Nathan Burke, who was known for frequent sexual jokes, was. Onemore Hudson Jakubowicz remarked that if one said "That's what she said", then he would show up. Nomore Alexander Huang responded with a statement to which the people sitting at the table replied "That's what she said", and while saying that, Nathan walked into view of the alcove, thus summoning him.